just need to vent

[sallyjack]

I am being dumped and just need to talk about it . I was on a bender(drinking doesn't help) he hasn't left me yet but when I came home from work on saturday he wasn't here and he never showed up until yesterday monday and that was just for a shower. He then left again saying see you tomorrow. I asked him what was up he said nothing is going on I said look I am a big girl let me no whats going on with you am I going to come home after work and find all your stuff gone in which he gave me the strangest look. So I think thats what he is planning.He is on my work medical and that costs me 101.00 a month I thought of asking him to sell me some of the things he has bought into this relationship I figure at least I would get something out of this I just spend hours reading getting over break ups the steps and all I don't have any close friends here to vent with or to be compassionate towards me most my friends tell he is an a$$ anyway but I hurt and would love it if someone would listen to my sorrows and I will listen to yours . Sorry this is so mixed up I just figured if someone just wanted to talk to me maybe I could figure out why this is happening

[nancy_9535]

it is strange that he doesn't have the heart to tell you why all of his things are no longer in the house... i suggest you confront him... I'm not sure what your relationship with this man is (bf/gf, married...) but it sounds like you really care about him, regardless of what others think he is. Relationships are based on trust and honesty: if you can't trust him to honestly say what is going on... You may have to bring it up... Although he hasn't said anything about strangely moving his stuff out... it is possible he may not break up with you... I know its easy to get upset over things that you think are true or will happen... I got upset when I thought one of my guy friends had a gf and another time when I thought one of my closest friend(who is a girl) was going to take him away from me... its a long story... if you'd like to read it ya can check my posts. But the thing is... I got over it... yes it took time and some tears but I did get over it... whatever happens... Its NOT the end of the world, trust me. Just stay calm and try to figure out why he's doing this.

[sallyjack]

Thank you nancy for writting back he is my live in boyfriend and he hasn't moved his stuff out yet I believe he is waiting for my days off to be over which happenes tomorrow . He is a strange and complexed man and I am a stupid woman He has done this to me before I came home and all his stuff was gone it hurt he had moved in with an x he came back and I asked him if he was happy and he said no and moved in again . Now its another x he is he did talk to me about it I told him he had to do what he had to do I didn't think it would be this though. we don't fight and get along I feel he is my best friend. But while I was reading self help stuff on here I think I am addicted to him because I don't want to be alone so I saved a get my self esteem back site to favorites and will work on that I am a giving caring person a safe house for him I think and seem to get used alot Boy this feels good just to talk it helps me get my thoughts together Thank you

[nancy_9535]

no problem I just find it strange that he keeps on moving back and forth between your house and his ex's houses... it just doesn't make sense especially since you two are boy friend and girl friend... you may want to talk to him about it and tell him how you feel when he keeps on moving in and out of your house... even though you've stated that he is your best friend as well as your boyfriend... I'm sure he'd never want to hurt you... but he won't know hes hurting you unless you tell him.

[sallyjack]

Hi again Nancy I did tell him. I knew he would come home today because I was at work I acually saw his Van go by any I left him a letter here it is

 

Hi ,

You won't talk to me so I have to write you I'm worried I don't know what your doing and maybe its none of my business

but I have to look out for me I am not a bad person my only fault is that I fell in love with you . I know you don't feel the same that's ok and

please don't tell me it has always been a one sided love because you have looked at me in the eyes and told me you loved me, if you have no

feelings for me any more let me go then its not fair on me the way I am being treated right now. I would wait if you asked I would let go if you

asked at least let me know what's going on with you.You disappear for 2 nights not a call a note, nothing of yours is gone and I am

not suppose to worry . I didn't phone you because I didn't want to be hung up on number one and I figured you have your reasons for doing

what your doing I wanted to give you space .Then you come home jump in the shower say see you tomorrow well tomorrow came and went I

am ready to let you go if that's what you want. I won't give you a hard time Its just the not knowing that is killing me

If there can't be a we ok I will be alright with that. But I have a heart Emil and your breaking it by not letting me know where

your heads at . I am not a piece of garbage I am human and have feelings excuse me for that

you know you told me you wanted to help Carolyn she was distressed well I feel like you have died and I just lost my best friend

do you have such little feeling for me that you can't see your hurting me this bad???????? If your worried that if you tell me that you do plan

on moving on with your life and are afraid I would do something with your things you know I wouldn't I am not vindictive your things are

safe here until you are ready for them. I am not kicking you out you will have to come to your own decisions on that

Please do the right thing I am

your friend and will never think badly of you but you can't just leave me hanging the stress of not knowing is making me sick I can't sleep I

have to force myself to eat this is affecting me badly stupid hearts anyway even if you don't want to move just write me that you are staying

away for a while no time limit Emil I will just know then that you are out finding yourself so you can be happy thats all I want you know for you

to be happy it would make me happy to know you were what ever you decide Love and my name

I gave him an easy way out because I really am that type of person and would never hurt him . He read it I know this by looking but I got nothing back all his stuff is still here he never even had a shower this time to weird. My friends are tired of hearing so I feel quite alone thats why I am writing here it helps so thank you again