Please Help - I need advice

[okura2]

Hi I need advice please

 

Background:

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I have a girlfriend. we are in a relationship for 5 years. We both are 27.

we see each other pretty much every day.

I like her ( not sure i love her ) , I feel comfortable together when we are together. She loves me very much.

 

Problem

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Now She said she wants to get married.

I have a mixed feeling.

I want to stay together because i think i won't find a girl like her who is very good match with me but also i feel i haven't experienced enough to know for sure she is the one ( she is my first girlfriend)

 

I thought about breaking up with her but everytime I see her , I felt so comfortable and also fear of not finding someone like her , make my thoughts go away but when i'm alone i think about it like a stuck in the loop.

 

I really dont know what to do (confused and depressed)

[NR498E]

Marry her you idiot.

If she treats you well and your phisicaly attracted to her you can't lose.

You don't know how lucky you are to have her.Chances are you wont really find anyone better.

If you dump her and find someone else per say.You'll probably find someone who has qualities A,B,and C that she doesnt have but lacks qualities X,Y,and Z that she does have.

I really believe that the universe is even.Thus if you you find someone else she may have what your looking for but she will lack what you have.

Goodluck homie,It's a gamble for real.

[PocoDiablo]

Yeah, and I have to admit that if you don't propose to her pretty soon she's likely going to dump you.

 

But you are having second thoughts, and if you're heart is not in it 100% then ... don't do what I did, which was marry the woman because you felt obliged to. I ended up getting divorced four years later. I felt kind of like how you do - just like she was cool, we were okay together. Warning signs that I should have looked for was the fact that we rarely had sex and she hated it, she was a cold hearted woman, was not good with my pets (and thus I did not want to have kids with her), she was financially irresponsible, and a few other things.

 

Basically, if you cannot see yourself having kids with her, it might be too soon for you. Now that I am much older, I feel MUCH more ready to settle down and have a family. And, believe it or not, after my divorce I found a woman who is much nicer and has a lot more going for her. So, you will get a second chance if you decide to jump.

 

(Other side of the fence...)

[godblessme]

I got married a year ago and felt the same way you did...this man is wonderful, he treats me well, loves me, would be a great father, we have the same religious backgroud and beliefs - all the important things where there..right!? Or at least I was telling myselft that.

 

Now the small issues are getting bigger and personality difference seem to be a bigger issue. He is a stay at home guy - I am a go out have fun girl. I am good with money. He doesn't know what a checkbook is... I have to do all these things that I would have hoped my husband would do. I feel like the man. I knew that it would be this way...just not as bad. I thought it would be ok - because all the important things were there...but were they??

 

Relationships are never as perfect as the MOVIES but you have got to go with your feelings - dont be afraid which ever way they lead you.

[fishrrshortae]

I agree with Mouse Potato,

if you don't love her .... you should let her go, and move on with your life before you waste any more of your time, and hers. You are being selfish to not let her know how you feel, and to risk losing her. After 5 years, you should DEFINITELY know whether or not she is the one for you, and it looks like she is not. Honestly though, I think if you did let her go, you would realize it was a mistake.