Anyone else in a relationship with a Navy officer?

[ehg228]

I've been dating my boyfriend for almost 3 months. He's a Naval Flight Officer. He's been home for the entirity of our (short) relationship so far. However, he left this morning to go somewhere (he wasn't sure where they were flying) or some amount of time (could be days, weeks, who knows).

 

I know that in the grand scheme of things I should not be complaining because a.) I'm dating someone in the military and I knew what I was getting into - especially having grown up in a military community and b.) this isn't a deployment where he will be gone for 6+ months. However, I'm very new at this whole "girlfriend of a Naval officer" thing and I've never dated anyone before who knows things they can't tell me about and goes to undetermined places for undetermined lengths of time to do undetermined things.

 

Basically I'm looking for people in similar situations to talk to. Thanks!!

[orgasmictofu]

Sure, it's not a military experience, but my bf is a trade's apprentice and it requires him to be away most of the time. His job started when we started dating. It's not so bad provided you're willing. I've done the long distance before thing and it's not easy. I'm crazy about this guy so I am willing to wait for him. He feels the same. It's a bit easier knowing exactly when he'll be back and when he'll be away, but you can make it work.

 

If it's allowed (sorry, I have zero military experience as I live in Canada and all my friends and family are hippies in that they don't believe in serving), talk to him as much as you can. Keep a connection going. You need to be able to trust him as well or else it'll kill you mentally. It's really not so bad. Just hang in there. If you are both willing to wait it out and put in the effort, it'll be worth it in the end.

[ehg228]

Thanks for the reply!

 

I've done the long distance thing before and it didn't work out well. I'm not really considering this long distance yet. Since he'll be gone such a short time (short meaning not months), he won't have access to email. Basically I'll know he's back when I get a phone call.

 

He's not career military so he won't be in forever. I just have to find things to do to keep myself busy.

[ehg228]

Thanks! How long will your ex be in Iraq? My friend's husband got back in December and is now in Officer Candidate School. She said it was bad at first but got easier.

 

When my bf goes on actual deployment I'll know how long he'll be gone and have email and all that. This time just sucks because he won't have email since it's a short "trip."

 

I do like him a whole lot though so I'm willing to go through this!

 

I Googled military support groups/forums online but didn't really have much luck. I'm not in the category of "officer's wife" which is where a lot of the support is. Yet anyway A lot of the support groups seem to be for enlisted guy's girlfriends and I don't really have the same situation as a lot of them. Hopefully that doesn't come out as horribly snobby.

 

Anyway, thanks for you response. Everybody's experiences are helpful!

[ehg228]

My friend's husband, who is in the Navy, was stationed with the Marines in Iraq (I can't remember where). He ended up being able to call her every day and they seemed to talk on instant messenger all the time. Hopefully that will be your case as well!

 

Yeah, this completely sucks not knowing when he'll be back. I was fine yesterday, but today I got off work early and had nothing to do in the afternoon. Luckily I have plans all weekend so I think that will keep my mind off it.

 

I'm so used to being at his place all the time that I'm not used to being in my apartment. I did laundry this afternoon and while I was folding it I just started crying. Pathetic, I know.

[prozzack]

i guess i know what profession im not going into