Only communicating on the phone!

[HeckaBekah]

I have a guy friend whom I've known for about a few months now. We are both very attracted to each other, but nothing is really going on between us (we have kissed each other once before). We talk on the phone often and most of the time we flirt and there's nothing serious behind it, but of course I want to get to know him better but it's so difficult for me not to have things go further then they are now.

 

We haven't hung out for awhile now and I think he sees that I'm not as enthusiastic about seeing him as I was before. I don't go out of my way because I want him to make some effort. Also, a part of me isn't as interested as I was before because I feel like I don't really know him. But perhaps I want to get to know him so much that I'm only disappointing myself. I figured that we can just keep a friendship since I tend to get serious with guys I'm interested in pretty fast, but now I wonder if I should just not contact him as often. But then again I need to learn to just be friends with guys. It's so difficult for me to since the guy friends I do have aren't like my girl friends who call me or hang out with me often. I just talk to them once in awhile.

 

So here's my question? Should I just continue to keep things the way they are while I lose interest in him. Or are there any benefits in not contacting him as often? Of course I am interested in meeting new guys, but I haven't meet anyone that has sparked my interest as much as this guy so far.

[HeckaBekah]

I just wanted to add that it seems like I am trying to make myself like him more than I really do in attempt to prevent myself from feeling lonely. I would be more interested if he made more effort so his actions would give more meaning to his words. I'm having such difficulty being patient because I want something more, but if I didn't want something more I would be fine. I know that I need to just not care and not want something so bad that I end up hurting myself. I wish I didn't feel so lonely sometimes. It's nice to talk to him on a regular basis just to have a guy I'm interested some how involved in my life, but I long for someone to be a bigger part of my life.

[goddess23]

wow you're more pessimistic than me! "should i just let things go the way they are while i lose interest..." well im in a somewhat similar situation...and to be honest the only real advice ican give you is to go with the flow. i mean you're into this guy so give him a LITTLE i mean you know flirt and make a bitt of an effort because he probably thinks that since this kiss you felt disgusted or something and now you've lost interest. (think of it from his point of view). so if you still want to do this little flirting game then flirtt i know you want him to do a little work and he might after his ego is slightly mended.

[HeckaBekah]

Well I meant that in a way where it would be best to lose interest because he doesn't seem like he's that interested in me. I've made some effort to see him after we kissed, but I don't want to continue to make effort since he hasn't come down to see me. He tells me to call him if I'm in the area he lives in or asks when I'm going to visit him.

[goddess23]

goo with the floww lol. if you feel he isnt giving enough then find someone else to occupy your time (but my God you sound like me! i mean im the same way its veryy hard to get intereseted attt all.) so if you're that bored then FLIRTT what have you got to lose but if you feel that your setting youreslf up for hurt then just leave it alone