I know I'm reposting, but please give me more advice, everyone has been great so far

[NPSoccer5]

A little background on my relationship. This girl has had only 1 serious relationship for 3 years before me. We became friends while she was with him and during that time she realized she didn't love him and broke up with him to be with me. The problem is that we rushed into a serious relationship from just being good friends as opposed to taking it step by step and gradually.

 

Now we have been in this relationship for 10 months now, and my girlfriend has told me that her feelings aren't there anymore. She says she loves me but is not in love with me. We initially broke up, but after talking we realized some things. We realized we still cared a lot about each other and that we still had affection towards each other, but she still thinks not love. So instead of breaking things off completely, we decided to take a break, without really any real contact for a couple weeks or so, and after that, if the affection was still there we'd try again, but this time we'll take it slow.

 

Is there any chance that this relationship could work? Does the fact that we are close friends help the situation? Or is it doomed because we already did the serious relationship and it didn't work?

 

I'm hoping that we just weren't ready, and we ran before we even crawled. I was just wondering what people thought about this.

 

Thanks.

[DN]

It sounds to me that she has difficulty in forming a close relationship - when she comes close she backs off. Frankly, I doubt that a break is likely to work in the long term because, even if you get back together after it, the same thing is likely to happen.

 

You can try but guard your heart and be prepared to be the one to leave if you think she is not trying hard enough to make it work.

[ocrob]

Well, my ex said the same thing to me. She said she loved me, but no longer had romantic feelings. If there is a chance of you getting back together, you can not be her good friend. I tried that and it killed me. I would just go NC and the time away from you will allow her to decide how she feels. You can't miss something till it is gone. If you remain friends with her, you will just be her support system. Wait till she starts dating and tells you things because you are her friend. I went through this and it was the final straw. If you can handle only a friendship, then go for it. But, if you love her, it will break your heart. Go NC and it could make her realize her feelings for you, but most of all, it will allow you to get over her and move on.