I hope this is the beginning of the end.

[Danny H]

Hi, I have posted on here before about My wife and I splitting up after 17.5 years( tsunami thread) anyway I'm still here at the house with her and the kids counting the days till I fly to India for head break.

 

Anyway I know I have been in denial but today things feel better somehow ( 8 weeks since split).

last night she went out to pub till 2.00 am I was s'pose to join her at 10pm but didn't go, I stayed here with kids.

 

I expected her to call for lift back at 11 is but when she didn't call I surfed and then went to bed at 12.30a.m

 

I woke at 2.00 and went outside for a ciggie, saw she wasn't home and you know what I DIDN'T CARE!!!.

 

No jealosy, no thoughts, nothing, blank.

 

just then I heard her footsteps coming up to the house, and we had a quick chat and I went to bed.

 

Today she is booking 3 weeks away to Thailand solo ( once I get back from India)- and again it doesn't seem to effect me- Before I would be thinking all sorts of things- you can imagine)

 

But now I am starting to feel " this is nothing to do with me"

 

You know what it feels like freedom.

 

I know there is no magic person right round the corner to heal my wounds, but I am starting to feel the urge for some fun!!.

 

Today at the shop for the first time in years I noticed a very pretty girl smiling at me, and playing with her hair, I felt a zap in my body I haven't felt for so many years.

 

I still haven't the courage to just start talking ( 17.5 years I'm very rusty-lol)

But it was nice to feel that connection.

 

Have a good new year,

 

and may everybody find peace within themselves

 

Dan

[chai714]

Dan,

 

My guess is that you will likely experience a rollercoaster of emotions - from happy, to worried, to anxious, to sad, to angry, back to happy, and so on.

 

Eventually, you will enjoy the real freedom once you heal up and get "over the hump." Best wishes in the coming year, stay strong.

[Relationship Coach]

I know there is no magic person right round the corner to heal my wounds, but I am starting to feel the urge for some fun!!.

 

You are 100% correct, don't look around the corner, look in the mirror. You have gotten past the hardest part Danny! You did it!! Now it's Danny time! You owe it to yourself to have a taste of life once again. Congrats!

[Danny H]

Thanks guys.

 

Relationship coach, I still think the hardest part for me would be if she moved somebody into our house to play daddy to my kids.

 

 

If that happens oneday I hope I'm in a place with somebody I love, so that I don't have to feel that kick in guts feeling that has hurt for the past 8 weeks

 

best

 

dan

[Relationship Coach]

But that's not about your feelings for her, it's about your kids.

 

My ex wife has been with the same person for 6 years now. Even though he was a major role in our divorce, I am thankful that he is good to my son. The most important thing is that your boys are treated right. You will never be replaced as their father but having another man involved in their lives is tough to handle at first. It hurt me more than I thought it would but it's all good now. I was alone during the first four years that my son was spending equal time with his mom's BF and now that I am married again and very secure, I have comfort in knowing my son is not meeting 3-5 different guys a week at his mothers. You will make it, I did.

[ocrob]

Dan, I am so happy you are getting over the hump. Good luck!