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Sex used to amazing, what has gone wrong?


loz2k29

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I have been with my boyfriend for 5 months now. we have been having sex for about 2. at first the sex was pretty good, i would orgasm quite easily, even quicker than him. the only problem is recently it hasnt been that great. i do suffer from frequent mood changes for example sometimes i am so worked up the sex is amazing, i dont orgasm but its still great. however other times like recently i do feel like i am in the mood but nothing is happening. we usually do the same thing, him on top then maybe me on top for a while.

 

i dont think i have had an orgasm for about 3 weeks now, maybe even 4, it starting to bother my boyfriend now too (ego thing as discussed on another thread) but it really doesnt bother me. i wouldnt mind another one though lol.

 

anyway after all my rambling i was just wondering what is wrong? does anyone have any tips? sometimes when we have sex it just feels like his penis isnt even there. it cant be that he isnt big enough because we have had sex before where he has gone really deep into me and hes found a place that felt amazing. however even now if he does this it isnt there.

 

i just dont know what it could be, maybe he isnt as hard as he's previously been? is it because i might not be in the same mood? it just feels like something inside me has changed recently or could it be him?

 

please help if you can with tips or similar experiences?

 

p.s. could it be that he is my first sexual partner and the sex was good at first but now ive grown accustomed to it and i'm no longer as sensitive?

 

p.p.s are there any positions you can reccommend to get deeper penetration?

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You're not desensitized to it, but I think that some of the intial fire has gone out. Thats normal, and should be expected.

 

I'm a big believer in the mind playing a huge part of having an orgasm. The more you start to dwell on having an orgasm, the harder it will be to relax and have one. Try not to give it a thought when you two are having sex.

 

As for bringing back that spark; if your comfortable try sharing some of your deep secret fantasies with each other. That might be enough to set the mood. Or even try to act out one of the fantasies.

 

Porn in the bed room has helped.

 

Role playing, especially with costumes.

 

Adult themed games.

 

Do you know what bedroom actions really turn you on? Knowing what it is that you like, can dramatically increase the fun in the bedroom.

 

Nothing is wrong, and everything is normal. Most people are content to let their sex lives die out, but its great that you want to keep that passion going.

 

Good luck!

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from everything i've heard or read, having an orgasm is 99% psychological and 1% physical. if you dwell on having an orgasm, you put too much pressure on the mind to actually have an orgasm. but the other ideas posted are actually great!

 

Using porn to maybe spice things up, if the bedroom antics have turned routine.

 

Explaining fantasies to one another, not even doing them, just letting them out to get the mind salivating.

 

use a vibrator while having sex.

 

have you tried doggy style?

 

what about oral sex? a lot of women can only orgasm by clirotal stimulation, i did read, however, that regular sex did give you a climax.

 

being relaxed is key, though. try getting him to give you a hot, candle-lit bath, sponging you down, maybe even giving your legs a shave! maybe just a massage, while you fantasize about the things he is going to do to you to make you feel good.

 

try contracting the vaginal muscles.

 

there are tons more of ideas and things to try i could list, but these are some of the good ones!!

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