Online Dating Profile Still Up

[Down-In-A-Hole]

Hello All!

 

Here's my problem: I met this girl off of an online dating service about a month ago and we immediately started dating after that. She initiated a boyfriend/girlfriend conversation about a week ago and we now refer to each other as being a couple and things are going great.

 

However, the other day I found that her profile is still up and that she is checking a few times a week. I took my profile down after a few dates just because I liked her enough to be content with just dating her. And I wouldn't have a problem with her profile still being up after a month of dating if we didn't get serious and have "the talk."

 

Needless to say, I'm starting to feel like I'm devoting too much time and energy into a relationship that might not even be that serious (although, she would have me believe otherwise).

 

Any ideas on if I should approach her about this? My gut feeling is to just let it go but dedicate less of my time to the relationship. Maybe I should put my profile back up and start communicating with other singles? I just don't want to be wasting my time with this girl.

[JRM]

I would just casually bing it up with something like "Hey, I saw you still have your profile up and check it...what's up with that?" You'll probably be able to wiggle a plausable explanation out of her.

[smallworld]

Hmmm. I agree with JRM. Have another serious talk about being a couple before you put you profile back up (which would signal to her that you're not serious either.) Hopefully this is just a misunderstanding.

[goingmadithink]

Yea, talk to her about it, but not in a hasrh way.

[RayKay]

Hmm, well if you are now officially boyfriend and girlfriend, the very least that should be going on is she is inactive. She can also just remove her profile from public profile but still "have it". My current boyfriend I met online for example, and it took us a while for all profiles to be gone, I had ones I forgot about but was totally inactive on. But her checking it frequently is a bit more suspicious!

 

It was funny though, as we both were still subscribed even when profiles were down I guess, so we would check out each others matches we got in emails for fun with one another, to make sure we measured up

 

Personally, I think you should talk to her about it, and make it sort of a "fun event" to take the profiles down.

 

Talk to her about it before putting a profile up, that just seems vengeful to me, and might be based on some big assumptions. She may just have it up with intention of meeting friends, or for her own self esteem...whom knows, but talk to her about it first before making any big moves you may regret!

[spiderman_56]

Well I don't think you need to get bugged by it ...

Well put back your profile and ironically send her a flirting message ...

she would see that yours is still up and to make even spicer tell her when she asks you which she will surely do that you still have old friends you chit-chat with ...

 

because obviously she still browse profiles and candy eyes other people profile... just make it fair game and have her have a taste of her own medicine and in no time you will know how deeply she feels for u

 

 

[lovecrazy]

my boyfriends profiles are still up on the dating sites, but he doesnt use them. Honestly if you feel in your gut that she will do something wrong, speak with her about something!