make her feel special....

[tightyo361]

hey... my girlfriend is kinda sad, because she feels that she isnt that pretty or anything. I find her to be the most beautiful girl in the whole world. She believes me that i think shes pretty, but when i tell her that shes the prettiest girl in the world, she says yeah right. This is due to a situation that happened a few days ago.... We were on the subway together and a lady got on who was kinda pretty and had an open shirt on... Well, i dont usually look at other women, actually almost never, ive tried to stop the habit but lots of times it is like a habit and i do it because its normal to me... I hate it though. So it was just like instinct (im not saying its right), and i just flashed a quick glance at her. My girlfriend caught on, and she felt terrible because she thought i only looked at her. She felt like she wasnt that special, and she felt uglier, just one of the many. I told her that it wasnt true, and that i almost never look at other women, i hate doing it, but when i do i dont imagine anything (which is true), its just like a habit once in a while.....

 

Well anyways, i just want her to feel beautiful and special. Ive brought her flowers a lot, ive sung her songs, written her cards. (before all this happened).. I was wondering if anyone knew of anything i could do now besides those things, things that would make her feel beautiful and special, maybe something original.... i would appreciate your help.

 

thanks

[seekinghappYness]

awww.. tightyo361 Im usually no good at giving advice but these are a couple of tips that will may make her feel beautiful and good about her self:

 

Give her lots of hugs and kisses.

Cuddle up with her.

Take her out on a special date....maybe a dinner or a movie, or let her decide.

Often let her know how beautiful she is and reasure her

If there is a certain physical feature you love such as her eyes or smile, tell her that.

When she dresses up, tell her how sexy, and desirable she is.

And always remind her How Much You LOVE her!

[tightyo361]

thank you seekinghappYness! if anyone else has any advice please post...

[smallworld]

Hey TightYo, I think it's really sweet that you want to make your gf feel beautiful and special. seekinghappYness gave you some great advice. All I'd add is have a heart to heart talk with her and let her know you're sorry if you inadvertently hurt her feelings. Let her know that you understand how she feels and that you'll do your best to make sure it never happens again. (I know, I know. It's difficult. But just try to keep your eyes off of anything female when she's around. ) Then tell her WHY you love her.

 

I strongly identify with your gf. In fact back in college I used to literally runaway when I'd see a girl approach my bf. Due to insecurities, it took me many years to accept that he (now husband) loves me just the way I am and finds me beautiful AS IS. No amount of compliments from him even now would ever sway me to believe I'm attractive, but when he tells me why he loves me I don't ever doubt it, because the things he loves about me are many of the same qualities I like and value in myself. Hopefully if you do the same, she'll learn to have faith in your feelings for her.

[tightyo361]

tiiight!! thanks!! that really encouraged me!

[BillyJean714]

You are one SWEET boyfriend! Just remember that.

 

How do you make her feel special? It's the little things that you say or do that will reassure her that she has one great boyfriend.

 

You can ask her how her day went. Check up and make sure she's okay. Send her text messages over the phone- e-greeting cards. Most of all, it all has to come from your heart. So far, it seems like you've done an excellent job.

 

There are some things that she needs to realize: just because you look at other woman, doesn't mean that you love her less or find her less attractive. I know how the feeling goes. Doesn't sound like you do it excessively.

 

Hats off to you for being a patient/sincere partner.

[Dating Coach]

You don't need to keep telling her this, you can show her this through actions and it means more. Plus, I am not surprised that she doesn't believe you. It's not that you aren't a sincere guy and it's not that you aren't honest, but if she doesn't think she is that pretty and then you tell her she is prettier than anyone including supermodels and celebs like Angelina Jolie, then she is going to think you're full of it and I can't blame her. It is unrealistic. I believe you really do think this but can you understand that from her perspective she won't believe you?

 

She's not going to believe you and there's nothing you can do about it. It's not a big deal though, you just need to quit bringing it up because it's going to annoy her that you are lying (in her eyes). Don't overdo compliments either because they lose meaning.

 

Show her how much you care through your actions and don't overdo them. Just be there, be a good guy, listen, and offer support. You'll be fine.

[ShySoul]

tightyo361,

 

You are a good boyfriend. In fact, I think you impressed 3 ladies on this post. That's pretty good.

 

There's not much to add to what they said. Bottom line is, follow your heart. Don't worry about whether or not you should be doing something for you her. Don't think you should have to be doing it. Just do what you feel like doing, do what your heart tells you do. A lady likes to feel special, to feel wanted, desired, and loved. And you seem to be a natural at doing just that. Don't change a thing.