How long before you missed your ex??

[PlayBrat]

Hey all, been a while since I posted. It's been about a month since I had contact with the "ex'....been keeping myself busy, but it's still yough. i still wonder if he even misses me...I don't know WHY I even care, but I do.

Anyway, just wondering how long it normally takes for an ex to relaize they miss yu...or to at least realize you're gone for good? Does it happen?? Having a tough today.

Thanks!

[PlayBrat]

PS...excuse the typos..lol ...Sorry!!!

[Hope75]

It depends on the reasons you broke up, and the kind of person you are. Some exes walk away and never look back. Others regret the breakup from the moment it happens. Why do you ask?

[PlayBrat]

I guess I asked because I am having a "down" day...and I miss him. I wonder if he misses me too...but I am trying to get out of this mode.

[RayKay]

Ex's can miss you at anytime, or realize you are gone, or feel regret things did not work out...but often they will still believe they have done the right thing.

 

It is unhealthy to worry about what the ex is thinking, it keeps you trapped in this mode of looking back and still focusing your life on them. I know it is hard to break out of, it takes time, but you need to learn to divert yourself when you do find yourself having thoughts like that.

[jna35]

I think it depends on the individual. Some have regrets, some don't. Some don't realize what they lost until years later. I hope you are able to move past him and find true happiness!

[Vert]

I agree with the above advice because some ex's (usually the one that does the dump, not the dumpee) were preparing for the breakup long before their partner was and thus are more prepared to deal with not seeing you. It's a cold hearted reality, but that's the way things are.

 

I think most people will tell you that the "rule of thumb" is take half the time you two went out and that's the general "healing" time it should take. Some take longer and others are far shorter. Again it depends on how the breakup went, the persons involved, and how long you knew the person.

[danimal77]

Playbrat, I have 3 words for you: HANG IN THERE!!!!!

 

You're doing great and keep it up!!! It gets much easier okay? There will be moments where you miss him and the reason why is because over time, we begin to start to forget the bad memories and the good ones start creeping in. If you are dating other men right now, you may even be making conscious comparisons with them and your ex, right? Yup, I've been doing it too. I haven't seen my ex in 3 months and have not contacted her ONCE in 2 full months...Breaking records baby!!! And they said it couldn't be done....HA!!!

 

Listen, stay strong and don't cave in. I'll give you a little method you can sue to make the time go by faster and also used to pat yourself on the back in the process. Pull out a calendar and circle the date you ended ALL contact with your ex. Now every day since then, put an X through it and continue to do so...It will seem like you are accomplishing something. Don't focus too much on the calendar and every now and then, forget theb calendar and come back to it as you see fit...

 

You are NOT doing NC for him, remember that. You are doing it for you...You are most important. Do things to make YOU happy and to hell with him...Seriously though, the missing him is normal. It's a diet of sorts and what's happening right now is that you are losing much needed weight and it is increasing your mental health and confidence. You are NO LONGER dependent on him and that is good. Now, as I said, keep it up...Let months pass by and get yourself in the RIGHT frame of mind, where if you ever decided to contact him, at that point, you will be so indifferent that whatever the outcome is, you will NOT be affected one way or another...

 

If you want to send me a PM, feel free to...

 

Danimal