FIRST TRUE LOVE

[littlegrl87]

i was going out with this guy and i wasnt ready for a realashionship yet, so i broke up with him. that was a year ago. we have been hanging out and getting to know eachother ever since. he has asked me out many times over the year but i said no bc i still wasnt ready. i am ready now and ive fallen in love. the problem is, he has given up on saying that he's asked me out so much and i kept saying no. he doesnt like me anymore and it hurts so much. i miss him already and everything we do together! what should i do and how can i get over him? everything makes me think of him and i just get this sick feeling in my stomach...

[StuckwivLife1607306436]

Hi there and fanx for your advice! It seems only polite to give you advice on your problem in return but considering the situation I'm in it will probably be lowesy advice anyway.... but the thought's there!

 

I am guessing from your username that you are fairly young and werevborn in 1987 which makes you 15?

 

Either way, as you probably worked out from my message and may have heard from other people, you're first love is always special because it brings you a new experierence and new strong feelings you've never had before.

 

If you are as young as I have guessed then I can understand you not have being ready for a relationship and being good friends instead was a good comprimise so long as 'both' of you were happy with that.

 

From the sounds of it though he always wanted more and kept asking you for it.

 

I think it is bad to wait around for someone until they're ready which sounds like what he may have been doing with you. It is best just to get on with life and if it happens it happens, but not to wait for that person to be ready for it to happen. Otherwise your life is put on hold for something that may never happen.

 

So he has done this for about a year now and probably taken it to heart everytime he asked you and you said no.

 

I guess that eventually this was too much for him and something gave way so that you are no longer friends now?

 

Does he not like you because you kept saying no? If so this is not really fair on you - so long as you made it clear when you first broke up that you would like to be be just friends and 'if' anything was to happen it would be when you were ready.

 

When a relationship ends that you didn't want to end there are always memories which remind you of that person you were with. Places you went, songs you heard, things you did together and special times you had together.

 

Keeping yourself busy and time is the only cure I know of for this.

 

After my first love ended I met the odd girl on a night out but nothing came of it, not even a one night stand. Then I met someone about 3 years later who very quickly made my first relationship seem like nothing and that new relationship was even more special to me.

 

The same will happen to you, especially as you never really had a proper relationship with him with you not being ready. Then you will look back and think that although you had feelings for this guy, they are not as strong as the feelings you will find in your next relationship.

[doggyfizzle]

Dont be afraid of the space between your dreams and reality. If you can dream it, you can make it so.

 

- Belva Davis

 

I have found the paradox that if i love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love.

 

- mother teresa