Encouragement pls-ex boi is bring new g/f to party *oh no*

[LilMiss]

my ex is bringing his new girl to a party this week.

 

I haven't seen him in almost 2 months, I've loved every minute of it and now I'm so full of crazy engery cuz I don't wanna see him but don't wanna avoid him either. I am going to this party but wanted some encouragement and words of wisdom.

 

Just wanted to get some advice/stories on how ya'll have handled seeing your ex for the 1st time with their new love.....

 

I'm hurt cuz of the way things ended with him and me but I don't want him back...so why am I being such a freak over this?

 

I think it may be just my insecurity...I need to love me more....*sigh*

 

"you must be the change that you wish to see in the world" gandhi

[Dateagain]

Do you have a friend who could go with you?

 

It's going to be awkward, no doubt about it. Just remember that time will make it easier.

 

Let your friend know that the two of you mught have to make an exit if it's just too much for you. Figure out a backup plan if you need to exit - something fun you could go do with your friend if really feel like you need to leave the party.

 

Good luck!

[lifeiscash]

I agree, that is going to be real tough for you. You might even want to avoid the party altogether if you don't know how you will be able to handle it. Date Again - gave some good advice with your friend. If however you do stay at the party that night then I suggest be upbeat, happy, and don't look like your jealous or hurt. Just act like you "don't need him anymore" but don't be rude. In fact my mom always used this saying -- "Niceness Kills". What I have done in recent situations, is that when you are at a party with an ex then most cases you will eventually talk to one another. Be polite and nice, "hey, how are you, its really good to see you, hope your having a good time" (with a smile on your face) and just continue on enjoying yourself with your friend or new people that you met. Good luck.

[LilMiss]

Dateagain: thanks for your suggestion, I'll be at the party with quite a few of my friends so I'm gonna make them keep an eye on me. I just don't wanna be cornered by the happy twosome and have to deal with their "new found love" for one another....but yes I'm gonna get a friend to be by my side. good idea yo!

 

Lifeiscash: just after I posted this topic I went to the gym and I feel much more clear headed and when you mentioned "kill'em with kindness" I realized I need to be a mature grown up woman who can deal with things even though my heart hurts, this won't break me and it will make me a stronger person.

 

Just wanna says thanks to both of you for your words and comfort, I won't be alone cuz I'll have your words in my heart and head....

 

*hugz to ya'll*

 

much love & hugz

lil'miss

 

"you must be the change that you wish to see in the world" gandhi

[Iceman26]

When you look at him with his new girl, think about this: She's the one that has to deal with his crap now.

 

That should do the trick.

[LilMiss]

*shaking head in massive laughter*

 

Thanks Iceman26, your comment actually made me laugh and today was a tuff one emotionally but your soooooo right.

 

I will not mourn for the fact that his new girl will have to deal with his crud.

 

I'm out and I'm free, it's just that when your free sometimes it feels like your alone.

 

I'm not alone, cuz as I can see I got ppl out there who I don't even know who are willing to help me.

 

Thank you...*hugz*

 

Work like you don't need the money

Dance like nobody's watching

& Love like you've never been hurt

(quote from somewhere)

[japhy]

I had the same situation with my ex recently...

Things to ponder:

1)I agree with the whole kill em' with kindness...

2)make sure you look good (you are money! carry your self like that)

3)don't drink too much.

4)it will probably be uncomfortable for them also.

5)when the party is over don't do anything stupid (calls, email, text etc.).

6)if it doesn't kill you it will only make you stronger.

7)maybe you'll meet someone at the party!

[loveydovey]

Great advice japhy!

 

**Making a mental note to do these things for myself the next time I see any of my exes. (show em what they're missing!)** 8)

[LilMiss]

japhy- thanks for your list, I think I may have to write them down and put it in my wallet when I go out tomorrow.

 

1) yes, I'll be nice but I won't false This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man....."-William Shakespeare

 

2) I am money and I'm gonna shake it like a pocket of change *heehee* I got a new dress for my b-day last month so I'm gonna rock it like a cheesey 80's hair band y0!

 

3) okay okay...i'll have to work on this not too much drinking thing

*giggles*

 

4) well I don't want them to be uncomfortable but the girlie girl in me hopes that they might feel a wee bit weird...but yeah...I do want him to be happy even though it's not with me....just wish I didn't HAVE to meet the new girl/f...*sigh*

 

5) the no calling this is not a prob, he has never ever tired to contact me since we broke up 2 1/2 mths ago, neither have I, reason: he never called me when we were together anyhow, that was one of the main issues for us-he just didn't like to small talk with me...*yeah he didn't like talking to his girlfriend-RED FLAG*

 

6) This won't kill me-so I WILL be stronger, hear me roar, I am woman *meow, meow* heehee *

8)

 

7) *secretly in my heart I hope I do meet someone sometime somewhere*

 

"Our greatest fear is not in knowing how weak we can be, but knowing how powerful we are" unknown