It's amazing the affect women have on men :)

[CamaroJoe]

I'm not really 'experienced' with this whole 'dating' thing. Mostly i meet a girl somewhere and then we're together. But I have a potential date this saturday. I say potential because she has tenative plans of going out of town.

 

So i told her i'd call her towards the end of the week. Now, i know this girl from a few years ago. We used to work together. I did take her out once, to the movies. But i then seemed desperate, i think. I came on too strong, i know that.

 

Well, I'm going to consider this a first date thing because i haven't seen her in a few years. My question, should I bring her something? Should I buy her a rose or some other kind of flower? I want to come off as seeing her romantically but not desperate and not in a hurry to start a relationship. ...any ideas?

 

Also, my plan is to take her out to eat, then I want to do something else. But i'm not sure what. Should I take her out to a movie afterwards? I'd rather go out and do something than to bring her home. Just because! Any ideas on what we can do after dinner?

 

 

Also, one more question if i may...if i get her something, when exactly should i give it to her? when I pick her up? should i pop it out when we get to the restaurant or afterwards? Or when i drop her off?

 

wow........i sound horrible. lol

[passions1]

There is no need to buy her something when you first meet, b/c it can backfire since then she may get the impression you are coming off to strong. However, if you know that you can get away with giving her a rose or something, if you know her well enough, then go ahead.

 

If she is interested in you romantically, you & her will continue to keep in touch regardless if you present the date in a romantic scenery or not. If you pay for her dinner & any other activities together it goes to show that you are a gentleman & do other chilvarous things ( ie open the car doors), then she would get the hint that you are not the typical casual guy friend category.

 

Just have fun on the date, don't think about how she thinks about you! Instead check her out & see how you think about her! In the dating scene you must have confidence & keep in mind there is someone out there for you, even if it may or may not be her. Good luck!

[RayKay]

Don't get her anything - can seem needy and a little odd (aka stereotypical) first date. Wait a bit until there are a couple more dates and more attachment (it will mean more then anyway, and you can learn what she likes before then and make it more personal - ie if she is a chocolate addict bring her a huge brownie you found at a local bakery).

 

Don't go to a movie, really again "typical" and hard to talk or anything during it. Go do something with more face to face time - play frisbee at the park (even in dark its fun) or go for a gelati and a walk on a cool, eclectic street with lots of nightlife...if you know her interests play with that (ie if she likes art, go to gallery).

[CamaroJoe]

Thanks for the advice. but i do have another question. this one just as lame as the others lol

 

do i let the woman order for herself or do i order for her in the restaurant? I usually let her order. Is that good?

[smorgie]

i definatly agree about holding off on giving her anything. You don't know how she feels about you and the situation right now anyways, giving her something might create an awkward situation.

 

I find for after dinner things....do something that keeps conversation flowing. Movies are pretty horrible for not doing that.

 

I guess depending on the mood of the date, you could go for coffee, dessert, a walk, go bowling, go skating, go play pool.

[smorgie]

Definatly let her order! ordering for her on a first date would come off controlling.

 

I suppose some women like being ordered for...but unless she says so in the future, definatly let her be her own person.

[RayKay]

Ugh no, don't order for her. I would be offended if someone did anything other than order the wine (and even then it is nice if they at least ask whether I like red or white!).

[CamaroJoe]

So we arrive at the restaurant...would holding her hand be out of the question?

[RayKay]

So we arrive at the restaurant...would holding her hand be out of the question?

 

On a first date without knowing her interests, yes, just approach it in good fun - HAVE FUN - and watch her body language. Right away at the beginning of date is WAY too soon IMO and seems clingy again.

[happyphantom]

This is what I think.

- Dont get her a rose or anything else.

- Absolutely do not order for her. Ask her opinion on things to do, places to go.

- Hold her hand, compliment her, and get close to her ONLY if it seems natural and the mood is right. Don't force it.

- Open doors, and let her walk in before you.....but don't go completely out of your way to do it.

- Be courteous, but keep your space. You dont want to come on too strong

-Relax. If you're nervous, its goign to show. Maybe you should have a drink or two before you see her.

- When you're talking, dont be afraid to look into her eyes.

- Be yourself and focus on having fun.

[valenski]

Dude dont be romantic be yourself stop worrying about impressing this girl and just make sure you enjoy the date. Since its a first date think of it as going out with a mutual friend, no roses, if its a gift make sure its something funny a silly hat, silly picture, silly t-shirt but gift is not important. Resturant nothing too fancy and like the other guys said instead of a movie find something else to do fun to do some great suggestions were made above. And when you take her home ask her out again, if all goes well that is, good luck, go get her tiger Grrrrrrr....