Should I act on this....

[Sapphire695]

I made a reply in the thread "Is my co-worker flirting with me?"

 

In my post I explained my situation that is similiar to the author of that threads situation. Anyway, the woman I like goes out to "Wawa" everyday to get a hoagie (east coast term for sub sandwhich). I'm thinking that the next time I see her in the parking lot some morning about saying "You really have me craving those hoagies. I'm going to have to go get myself one at lunch today. Where's that Wawa again?" Then hopefully she will say: "why don't you come with me when I go?" I figured that is easier than asking her out for a drink just yet.

 

How does that idea sound?

[kaboom]

sounds great to me! That way u get to know a few things at a time!

You get to know if she really is into you (if she is, there's NO way she'll tell you to screw off)

u'll get to know her at a far more relaxed time than going out for drinks, since its lunchtime its not like u met specifically and thereforeeee feel obliged

and u'll get to know if them hoagies are any good!

Excellent idea!

go get her!

[Sapphire695]

Thanks!! I think I just might do that. I know she like to golf, so I might mention something about golfing like "I always wanted to learn how to play", even though I have NO interest in the game what so ever!

[kaboom]

careful!!! I think honesty is a better strategy, lies or "white lies" can backfire on you! Not fun if you're caught.

I'd say it'd be best if u show urself as you truly are, and that way u're sure that she wont be mislead, which could cause you trouble later on.

enjoy!

"Don't you want somebody to love, don't you need somebody to love, wouldn't you love somebody to love, you'd better find somebody to love" (The Jefferson Airplane, Sombody to Love)

[Cadence308]

I agree that being honest is better than lying. Instead of saying that you always wanted to play golf you could say, "I've never played golf. Is it fun? Is it hard?" Just ask her questions about something that she loves to act interested in her and then she may invite you golfing or some other activity.

 

Your idea about the hoagie is a great one. You could say, "Are the hoagies at Wawa that you always get really good? I'm thinking about going there for one for lunch today." Wait for her response and then say, "Where is it?" Then she may invite herself to show you where it is. Just play dumb a little. I guess that's all that's required in dating. If you can play dumb you can ask someone out or at least hint.

[Sapphire695]

Thanks for all your advice and input!

 

I did notice that on some days she is more flirty than others. She never ignores me unless we see each other in the bathroom and I am with some of my co-workers. That is usually the only time we might not say hi to each other. But, to me that is probably a good sign, because if we liked each other as only friends, we wouldn't feel funny acknowledging each other infront of certain people....right?

 

As I was waiting for the elevator in work on Monday, I noticed her coming (she was walking in and talking with a man from her office) so I held the door for them and when she got on she said "thanks, dear!" and then stood right next to me and stared a little intensley in my eyes for a moment and then glanced down the front of me. I can only imaging what her co-worker was thinking, plus there was a woman in the back of the elevator. I can only imaging what they were thinking...LOL!!!

 

I did also notice that when we're walking forward and talking, I will look at her and she will have a little smile on her face...it's so cute!!

 

Anyway, Is there some subtle way I can find out for sure if she's lesbian without coming out and asking? Also, how do I know for sure when she glances down the front of me that she's not checking out my clothes? Then again, I get plenty of compliments on my clothes, but never notice anyone else look me up and down like that.

[Cadence308]

People don't just look other people up and down BECAUSE they know if they do they will give that other person the feeling that they are romantically interested in them.

 

You're right, it's pretty much impossible to find out if she's a les for sure without asking her. If you know her as a friend, there's always a better chance of finding out because you can ask her if she's ever kissed a woman or been with a woman before or talk about politics and work it into the converstation that way.

 

Is there anyone at work that she may be friends with that would know for sure that you could ask?

[Sapphire695]

She works for another company than I do, so I really don't know who she's friendly with. I know she talks to mostly men men because she told me the other day that's why she took up golf because all the men she works with play. So I guess she considers herself one of the guys. I don't really see her hang around with anyone either. She is always alone when she goes out to pick up her hoagies. It's funny because today I ran into her in the elevator and she was with a lady that works in her office. I could tell she was kinda looking out of the corner of her eye to see if I was going to get on the elevator too. I did get on and when I did the door started to shut a little and I guess I kinda shuddered and she said to me "Don't worry, we won't let the door hit you", then next she said "I MISSED YOU THIS MORNING!". She did glance down the front of me real briefly also. I was going to use that hoagie line tomorrow, but she said she won't be in tomorrow, so I'll use it on Monday. I'm just at a point where I feel we are both interested in each other and I want it to go to a further step outside of work! But...as I'm not 100% sure, I just hope I'm not mistaking friendlyness for flirtyness.

[patience]

awww...that's soooo cute!!!

 

Okay, here is what to do. Ask her to lunch. Don't give hints, don't be coy, don't make up any weird stories. Get to know her better, and go from there. Never mind right now about how she defines herself. She seems interested in getting to know you, you are interested too, so just go from there. If she is interested in you romantically, you'll know soon enough.

 

Good luck! Keep us posted!