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kaboom

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Everything posted by kaboom

  1. I have this going on with a friend. It's been going on for a while without any problems. I think the trick is not abusing it, and doing it with someone you are not excessively attatched to. As someone said before, repetitive sex with a person WILL eventually lead to an emotional response. It CAN be done, but it requires that you both are VERY honest about your feelings and what you want from the beginning. Its no good starting it off thinking "I'll stop it if it doesnt go the way its supposed to" because that just CAN'T be done, specially with two people involved. It can be dangerous, but it can definitely be done. Who old are you? this is an issue that varies greatly with age and maturity. Cheers!
  2. sex and handcraft, no problem with me whatsoever. In fact as someone before said, i think it feels better. Now about going down south, i dont think i'd have a problem doing it, but my gf wouldn't let me, so i can't say if having tried it i'd have been disguted, but in principle it doesnt pose a problem. Cheers!
  3. Whoa dude, how i envy you. i'd never be able to do sth like that. Heck if u like it, u got nothing to lose! (well perhaps the possibility of a more subtle attempt later on) My reaction is the same as Brahman's. ARE YOU NUTS!!!??? but that's only because i'm a real chicken and not brave to try and do sth like that. And it sounds like a great (and very erotic) way to get sth started. go!
  4. Its never a good idea to come out when you are not ready, but there's also never necessary to come out to EVERYONE. Also, I think before coming out u should sort out whether you are actually bi or lesbian. If you come out as bi and then turn out to be les or vice versa, people won't really take it seriously and tell you you are "confused". god how that one PISSES me the F**K off. Being bi, the way it is for me is that I would have a fling, and i am sexually attracted to both sexes. However for a long term relationship i would probably choose a woman. I however don't rule out the possibility of having a stable relationship with a man. See how you view men, and women, find out in what ways you are attracted to them and then come to a conclusion about your sexuality. Your parents don't need to know, and possibly dont want to know. Heck i've been outta the closet for 4 years now and my parents still don't know. don't stress about it. cheers!
  5. I think the best way to come out of the closet is just to "slip" out of the closet. You don't need to go around with a t-shirt saying "I'm gay and i love it!" and wearing a gay flag as a cape, but you know, just don't hide it, don't shut up. If the topic comes up, mention it. I guarantee once a couple of people know, it'll spread like fire. In this day and age, there's gonna be very little reaction from the straight community, they are used to us by now, but this dramatically increases your chances of meeting someone. Not every gay/bi etc person is hard partying and stuff. Fine a lot us are, but i have plenty of gay friends who aren't exactly social animals. And one of them has a wonderful boyfriend. At a certain point lots of people start getting nervous about not having a boyfriend and stuff. Chaging the way you are (ie, start going out and drinking and all the stuff u don't really like doing) to find a boyfriend is a recipe for disaster, because the person you will find won't be what u're looking for. Just be patient, and you WILL find someone. after all, we ARE 10% of the popultion. not that tiny a proportion.
  6. treat the **** out of urself!!! Go to tiffany's, and then go somewhere nice get some clothes to go with the new jewelry! go to a spa, get a massage, go get a new haircut (but this one's potentially dangerous as sometimes hairstylists get too "creative") Go get that cake u really like just after the spa when u feel best, and have dinner with some female friends (if u can get that working with so little time) to celebrate ur time away from that bastard and how much we men suck. U know in spanish there is this one popular saying that goes "much better alone than in bad company" Have an awesome day tomorrow oh and post pics of whatever u might buy! cheers!
  7. Annie u never heard of a condom slippin' off? i sure don't wish it upon you, its a horroble experience... it happened to me and my gf (and NO, it didnt have ANYTHING to do with sizing!) and its really screwed up. In any case, if the condon slips inside you, you can either as u said poop it out or just pick it out. believe me, if your anus was stretched enough to take a penis, you can slide two fingers in and pick it out. As the others have said, i think this is completely loco. Whether u're gay or not, giving ur anal virginity to a guy u dont even know is just plain screwed up, at least from my point of view. And remember we're not talking just some innocent fun here, some innocent fun is when i did it with my friend whom i had known for a LONG while and i knew was perfectly clean (and even then i was taking a risk). you are talking potential death. but! if you're cool with it, and use protection or just dont care about dying (hell i know a bunch of people that dont, including meself, but i just dont fancy a slow death), then go right ahead. Penis is actually really great!
  8. U know the pink triangle thing actually has very dark origins? That symbol was first used to set homosexuals aside in nazi concentration camps. Most homosexuals were executed. And here u have us today, using it as a means to publicize our homosexuality! people are weird. In any case yeah, a rainbow belt is pretty much of a givaway. Cheers!
  9. dude u say u're concerned as if being bi was a bad thing (some people do think so, which i find a perfectly respectable attitude though). you are bisexual when you are attracted to people of both genders. That means u see a man and think "whoa he's cute, i wish i could get into his pants" and u see a woman and think "whoa she's cute, i wish i could get under her skirt". Watching porn gets ANYBODY aroused, its just the way humans work. if you wanna find out, dont check out straight porn, just check out pictures of naked women, or just women. If u don't know where to find them, PM me and i'll give you a hand. And about ur parents, relax, they neednt know... My father is a homophobic bastard and i've been out of the closet for about 4 years to the whole world except my family. They dont know, they dont need to know, and its all just smoother this way! one thing is realizing you are Bi, and a completely different one is publicizing it to the whole world. Cheers!
  10. Narh, sticky hands aren't usually a problem when its your OWN computer... However once a female friend borrowed my laptop and she started yelling when she found a pube while typing out her theory of knowledge essay...
  11. It depends on how its said, who says it, the tone of voice he uses, the situation... Lets just say that there IS a huge difference between calling someone gay and calling him a goddamn faggot, or a goddamn dyke, however gay can be used as an offensive word. However if its used in a derogative way against me i'll go off like a rocket against homophobes... Its not in the word, its how you use it.
  12. I would say time has come for drastic action, and you are both in the same situation! She can't be sure whether u like her or not, and she doesn't have the balls to ask you, and you can't be sure whether she likes you or not, and u dont have the balls to ask her! its pretty obvious she's a les, just ask her out! u get turned down, well that sucks balls for you, but at least u'll know what's going on! Damn, too much "balls" in this post... must be becaue of the golf hehehehe
  13. Whoa dude, I remember when i was coming out of the closet (I'm bi) the thing that got me ENRAGED (and still does) was people telling me either of the follwing: 1: That I was confused 2: That it was a phase 3: That i was lying and that it was just to get attention. Don't let ANYONE tell you whether u're confused or not, or tell you how things SHOULD be like. If your mom don't like the fact that u like other women, well tough luck for her! Believe me she'll eventually have to accept it, possibly after u start taking girls home... hehe. In any case, unless your mom isn't stopping you from being yourself or from doing stuff, ignore her. U've already told her, and she'll eventually come round. She has no choice anyway. About the LGBT group, It doesnt need to be a highly-pubicized association of any sort, just create your own! Start meeting people and people will pop up, and u can relate to them. Dude we LGBT make up 10% of the population. out of ten people u cross on the street, one of them is gay, you're BOUND to find some. Cheers!
  14. lets see how long it takes a chick to pop up writin' about how lame men are for measuring their penis...
  15. I fully agree with Ken. once the "in love" is gone and things start going downhill, and trust dissappears, there is very little you can do to salvage a relationship. I gather its your house, well suggest politely that she should leave. At 31 you are obviously working, well start hanging out with your co-workers! dont "bump into" their group, but u know, just start getting a bit more social, ask them if they mind you joining them for coffee or drinks at some point. If you don't really know many people you're probably shy, and that's gonna be a real problem. You're gonna have to overcome thy shyness in order to carry on. It can be done. you're probably feeling like sh¡t at the moment, but u'll see how everything starts getting brighter are u start knowing more people and u start enjoying life. cheers!
  16. DON'T!!!! its HELL. believe me, i did it just to try, because my girlfriend shaved herself, and i had the most horrible two weeks after it. It WILL get bumpy, it WILL itch like you can't imagine, and it doesnt look sexy at all. As everyone before has said, trim it, but shaving is definitely a BAD idea
  17. Ok, i sat my exam, i got skrewed, and now i'm back! My coming out process was very gradual, and we could say that after two years its not yet finished since my family doesnt (and wont) know. more about this later. At age 15 I was in an international boarding school FAR away from home and I started to get very fed up with having to cover things up, having to shut up and having to watch every word i said in fear i would "slip". So I told my best friend at the time. He was russian, and a lot of russians are very into their "manhood" and how any behaviour which isnt that of a correct macho-man is deserving of hell. I trusted this guy with my life and i knew he wouldnt blab. He did have quite a hard time digesting it, but since he'd known me for a while and we were roommates everything went smoothly in the end. Then for a long while I didnt tell anyone else in fear that the word would spread VERY rapidly, which would arguably make my life hell considering how small a boarding school community is. Next term (after summer) we went on a little field trip, where i told this girl to whom i was REALLY close at the time, and it turned out she was bi too, that was REALLY cool. during that term me and a few of my friends used to do this really stupid thing which consisted of staying up ALL night in the middle of the week, just talking and smoking and watching movies and then go to class without having slept. In one of those i told four friends at once. They were all really shocked, but apparently they finally accepted it. they made the occasional joke but up to this stage i hadn't yet gotten heat from anyone at all. I started telling select friends, and all of them took it VERY well, except this one girl who just couldnt understand it... well when you start telling people at school or work or sth like that, the world will start spreading at some point. In my case it didnt spread, it exploded... Apparently two friends which knew were talking about it in whispers in the middle of an english lesson. Apparently this one great BASTARD who i can't stand (and who couldnt stand me...) overheard and YELLED it in the middle of the lesson. In about 6 hours the whole school, including the teachers, knew. Lots of people came asking if it was true, and i only got heat from a couple of russians, who came to my room and tried to "talk me" into being strait. Obviously, they failed miserably... I got the occasionally joke and stuff, but so long as u know how to handle them, then it doesnt matter. After i finished highschool i came back to spain. Right now i'm fully out of the closet (while outside home) and i dont have to tell anyone. In fact i dont mind if people know or not. Most of them will guess from the coments i might make. I dont need to go around with a big sticker saying "yo people i am BI!" on my forehead. I just dont hide anything either. I've had no problems here either, aside from the occasional comment both from gays and straights. I guess u just live with it. Now my folks aren't gonna know because they are VERY, VERY homophobic, and i dont feel like getting thrown out of my house before i finish college. this sound excessive, but that's just the way my parents are. So basically no one's gonna give u tons of heat, no one's gonna single u out... Some people might be shocked, but in the end, everything's cool. Parents are usually A LOT more understanding than me... And don't worry, telling people gets easier EVERY TIME. plus u only have to do it a few times because believe me it WILL spread, its a fact of life. Take ur time, dont push it if u think u're not ready, but believe me, its GREAT to be out of the closet. I hope this didnt bore you! Cheers!
  18. link removed EXCELLENT WEBSITE!!!! my story got lost in the sands of time, and i have a civil law exam tomorrow for which i havent even opened a book, so i can't type it now, but i promise tomorrow i'll be back and type it! cheers!
  19. I'd much rather worry and have you live. Of course you didn't upset us by posting! if we got upset by that kind of thing, we wouldnt be hanging 'round here would we? I think the time has come to start being a bit more selfish. stop thinking about what the others will think/will be worried about. they're there for you, and u'll be there for them. don't think people are better off without you, because they wont. Everyone is important, and everyone will be missed. Please keep posting, and keep fighting! Check ur PMs
  20. careful!!! I think honesty is a better strategy, lies or "white lies" can backfire on you! Not fun if you're caught. I'd say it'd be best if u show urself as you truly are, and that way u're sure that she wont be mislead, which could cause you trouble later on. enjoy! "Don't you want somebody to love, don't you need somebody to love, wouldn't you love somebody to love, you'd better find somebody to love" (The Jefferson Airplane, Sombody to Love)
  21. sounds great to me! That way u get to know a few things at a time! You get to know if she really is into you (if she is, there's NO way she'll tell you to screw off) u'll get to know her at a far more relaxed time than going out for drinks, since its lunchtime its not like u met specifically and thereforeeee feel obliged and u'll get to know if them hoagies are any good! Excellent idea! go get her!
  22. hey dude post up! u never came back to tell us how things are going with you! Its been a week and i'm almost sure everything's better, and if not, its VERY close to getting better. I am Bi, and instead of coming out, i got PUSHED outta the closet (told a couple of close friends, but then someone overheard a conversation and it spread like gunpowder all over the school, great...) And although i did get some heat from some people, it all was cool in the end. U know, even though u're probably going through hell at the moment, its always best to be out of the closet. It just allows you to stop lying and pretending and in the end, it just takes a huge weight off your shoulders. Sure every now and then u'll meet some homophobic idiot, but they're just not worth listening to.
  23. No it does not mean you are gay because u are still attracted to men. As u probably remember from another thread, I am bi. I get turned on by both men and women (and it doesnt need to be porn, just a hot man walking down the street is enough to make my mind drift...) but in very different ways. Its actually quite a complex thing, but boiled down to the basics, if i think of me in bed with a woman, its more like i'm protecting her, taking care of her, making sure she's ok, and if its a man, its more like i want to be held and taken care of. Pornography will usually arouse women. it was always been used in psychology for all kinds of things. I think the issue here is, if you see a very good looking woman walking on the street or sitting accross the table, do you feel attracted to her? I wouldnt trust only porn as a means of telling you about your sexuality. cheers!
  24. NOOOOOO!!!!! no hurt yourself!!!! that really isnt the way either!!! Splicing your skin or punching walls isn't going to help either! Taking out pain with pain really isnt a good idea, because its sorta like using drugs to ease the pain. It might make it go away for a while, but in the end it just comes back, its worse than before, and u feel it on top of the pain coming from ur skin. Lean on your friends. Real friends will never tell you to bugger off when they know you need them. just let them now you are feeling really down, that life sucks ETC... i think u need to look at what's making life suck at the moment, and see if you can change anything. oh and if u ever need to talk, email removed and i'll give you my number. there is a BIG time diff from the states to spain, but if anyone ever needs to talk that phone is open 24/7/365 Things WILL get better
  25. if you get sexually aroused just THINKING about those celebs, then gay is out of the question. The way it goes for me, I go through "cycles". For a while i'll find more men than women hot and given the choice, i'd rather be in bed with one of the two (but its not like I ever stop being attracted to either genre). I dont have this "gay" feeling all day long, the same i dont have the "straight" feeling all day long. Not wanting a relationship with a guy doesnt make you straight, it just makes you scared! Go out to a gay bar, see if you enjoy the atmosphere, see if you enjoy being hit on (i can almost guarantee it will happen). Be careful because a lot of them take things VERY fast. Just be able to say NO where u want it to stop, if you want it to stop at all. MOST importantly, don't do the above if you don't think you're ready or if u dont like 1-night-stands. Just a little test 'ere. U give chick names that turn you on. Do the same with MALE celebs.
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