depressed/confused --- i need help!

[plasticheartsandsmiles]

my bf broke up w/ me a few weeks ago w/o good reason. he said that he didnt feel anything for me anymore. i dont understand how a person can suddenly decide that they dont love u anymore. we had a relatively stable relationship but we had our problems like everyone else. even up until the breakup he still acted like he still cared for me so thats why i guess this whole thing is so confusing. its like ive got no closure and i feel like maybe he does still care for me but is confused. do u think i could be right??? depression runs in his famliy so im thinkin that maybe he is just depressed b/c i was told that if ur depressed it can make u doubt everything in ur life. i dont know if hes ever gonna come back to me or not.. he says he wants to keep contact but i doubt hes gonna put forth any effort w/ that. what is the best thing for me to do??? do i let him go completely? i love him so much that i cant just let him go without trying. i dont see how a person can wake up and decide they dont wanna be with you anymore and throw away such a long relatoinship where they know they were loved. u'd think a person would at least try!

 

this break up has caused me to hole myself up in my room and i dont want to see people. i went for like 3 days and didnt eat anythign just drank softdrinks. we've been dating for 2.5 yrs so yeah this is huge. ive been cheated on and broken up with before so i feel like theres somethin wrong with me. if there wasnt anything wrong with me then u'd think that id find someone to love me completely. im so devastated b/c i thought we'd work...i really thought he was gonna be the person i was gonna marry one day. i think he even thought we were gonna be together too b/c he had mentioned that.

 

i want to disappear and never be seen again. help PLEASE!!! i need some answeres & tips cas i cant go on without him.

[ghozt]

he might not have romantic love for you anymore but he still cares for you and he will love you till the end. once you love some one you can love them until your death and maybe even the after life.its not your falt he dumped you trust me. my friend is going through this right now too. i talk to his ex she says she still loves him but not in a romantic way. ive also loved some one but a tragic accident took her away from me but even though shes gone i still lover her. loveing and careing dont go away with a spimple break up. locking your self up in your room eating noting aint gonna get him back you need to move one go to your friends and just get out this week end. remember he wasnt the only one who cared for you.

[whatfor]

hi sweetie,

im sorry you are feeling this pain now. I know what it feels like. My bf almost broke up with me today, and it has happened twice already in the past couple of months and its hard cause we are in an LDR and its hard to work it out.

So i dont have all the answers for you. Before i used to say things happen for a reason, but i myself dont know what these reasons are.

And its no way your fault that guys break up with you and cheat on you, its them who have a problem, not you.

I know break ups are horrible and painfull and all i can offer you is ((hugs)) and if you need to talk pm me.

[whatfor]

locking your self up in your room eating noting aint gonna get him back you need to move one go to your friends and just get out this week end

 

ive been there and not eating its not something you do to get them back! eating its just something u cant do while feeling so depressed.. all you can do is cry.

 

I hope you feel better, we all are here to support

[CrystalDawn]

Just relax and let it go for a while when your less emotional and can talk calmly ask him why he broke up with you. He might explain then. I know it hurts. If you want to try to talk to him I see no harm in it. Don't make a big deal out of it though. It could be because he needs a break for a while two and a half years is a long time.

[ghozt]

watfor :

trust me i when through the hole not eating fase and it landed me it a shrinks offeice so no matter the sittuation try to eat even if its a craker . you dont eat cuz you whant to gain the attetion or some one attetion even if you dont mean to do it. it just happens

[whatfor]

watfor :

trust me i when through the hole not eating fase and it landed me it a shrinks offeice so no matter the sittuation try to eat even if its a craker . you dont eat cuz you whant to gain the attetion or some one attetion even if you dont mean to do it. it just happens

 

um.. i went through one break up... i didnt want to eat cause i just didnt want to eat... it wasnt for anyones attention.. i was alone there... and i ate once a day a bit of salad only cause i knew i had to eat, still didnt want to. Its just how it works when you are depressed. When something goes wrong you just get this feeling of full stomach

[plasticheartsandsmiles]

yeah, everytime i did eat something it made me feel sick. im not not eating for anyone's attention, i physically cant.

[CrystalDawn]

Try eating light stuff like broth or something just so your strenth remains because not eating can drain you easily. Take small portions if you can't handle large ones. I've been there before. Just drinking broth or eating a small cup of soup will help. Tea is great for an upset stomach. Broth can help too.

[thisisnotanexit]

there's nothing wrong with you. at your age, stuff like this happens. relationships come and go so easily. i'm not saying its easy to deal with, but im saying that it happens and you're not to blame. one day you will find someone that works for you, or who knows you might get back with him. either way, don't blame yourself. it's really weird you say all this because last friday i broke up with my g/f. we were dating 2 years, but i realized i wasn't in love with her anymore. i dont' hate her and i do want to be friends, but i'm just not where i need to be right now. i need to grow some more. maybe he just needs some space to grow? go to this site to help you deal with this right now

 

link removed

 

take care!!

[plasticheartsandsmiles]

thanks for ur (thisisnotanexit) advice. and yea thats weird that the same thing is goin on w/ u. how did u know u didnt love her anymore?? how does that happen to a person? i know it can but i dont get how you can be in love with a person for a period of time and then over time start NOT to love them. it doesnt make any sense. and what if this is just a spell? i dont know if i need to hang on to him or not.

 

i cant get over it and its effecting everything i do in my life. i dont find joy in things that use to make me happy and i dont want to see anybody. i feel so lost because he's missing. i want to talk to him (in general) but know thats probable out of the question.

 

everything seems lost and i dont get him!!!

[thisisnotanexit]

it's hard to explain. i just changed. as we get older, sometimes that happens. and if things don't work out between you two, you will see that in time you grow and change..and you will see that you can live without him. things will be hard for a while. but try to remember you will get over this and you will love again. you sound like a great person, i have no doubt things will work out. take care

[whatfor]

i know how you feel plasticheartsandsmiles,

im also going through s**t right now in my relationship, if i can still call it that, its going down the hill.

I also am dying inside and dont feel like seeing anybody.

There is a saying - sometime you will have a relationship that will make you relaise why the others didnt work out, - i thought it was about my currenct relationship and i hope things will work out... but at the moment seems impossible

I know its hard,

hugs

[plasticheartsandsmiles]

thanks a lot. it actually does help to know that other people have or are experienceing the same thing as me. i'm ready for this pain to be over. i know time heals all things but time seems to be crawling by.

 

i thought my ex and i were happy and that we were gonna last. funny how things can shatter at the drop of a hat. i just wonder if, with some space, people can have a change of heart? i wonder if he doesnt have me in his life for awhile if he'll realize what hes missing. its like thisisnotanexit says, maybe he needs space. damn, thats what im hoping. what do u guys think?

[whatfor]

I wish i knew the answers to all your questions.

Some do come back when its too late. Some do need space.. sometimes you need time away to realise if you miss your partner.. But some people say if they want time away then they want to be away from you which isnt right.. i dont know.. i really wish i could know my future. at the moment it sucks

hope you are feeling well.