Is he addicted to porn?

[janeeka]

I was messing around on my bf's laptop when I noticed he has a few porn websites in his directory, as well as an article on quiz entitled ''are you addicted to porn?'' - this has worried me. Does he really have a problem? He's always been honest about enjoying porn - he's a 22 year old lad after all - and says he only looks at it when bored or when his mates send him stuff. This seems to be pretty often, I guess boys will be boys. I just can't help worrying. It's not affecting our sex life at all, and he's always saying how beautiful and sexy I am and that the majority of porn stars are unattractive due to their falseness.

 

What do you guys think?

[snowgirl]

Why don't you just ask him?

[janeeka]

I know I should. But he has a tendency to gloss over things and make everything seem like an insignificance when inside it's a major issue. I'm not too sure what it would achieve.

[snowgirl]

It may not be easy, but its possible. Just say exactly what you wrote.

(were you snooping in his browser history? Does he know you were on his laptop?)

[janeeka]

Yeah he gave me his laptop to play with whilst he left the room to shower. I don't think he'd see it as snooping as the links were there for all to see, plus he reads my text messages, which is snooping!

[whatfor]

people all look at port, males and females. If it doesnt affect your sex life then i dont think there is a problem. Porn can help with new ideas and stuff. Be thankful he likes porn and is not a spado.

Talk to him. I watched port with my bf. It can be fun. Maybe you should just join him

[snowgirl]

Everyone is different, and people have their opinions about porn.

Whatever that is, I will repeat: You need to have an open and honest conversation with him about it.

[janeeka]

I have suggested we watch porn together, but he didn't seem particularly keen. Which is a shame, as it turns me on too. I will talk to him soon.

[rosierizzle]

just talk to him, everyone has different opinions of porn, just accept it - he's 22 of course he's gonna look at porn!

[janeeka]

I'd just like to clarify that I don't have a problem with him watching porn - heck I do it myself from time to time - but this link to a porn addiction site has got me wondering if it's a little more than him being a typical guy.

[Day_Walker]

Think about it this way if porn is one of the major things in his life and it hinders him from doing other things then it has become a problem. I am not a fan of checklists to determine addiction, it most cases people can be persueded to think they have an addiction when they actually dont. If his habit with porn isnt a problem and if it hasnt interferred with anything then why put the thought in your head?

[evidica]

Talk to him, ask him if he thinks he is to stop watching it and see if he has an urge too. Thats and addiction if he has urges to watch it. Now their is a difference between having a sexual urge and a porn urge, dont get those confused. The best time to determine if its an addiction is if he masturbates to it to see if he still wants to watch it afterwards.

[hopelessly_devoted]

To the woman with the question about her boyfriend and pornography.

This is only my very deep personal opinion as I am not only someone who believes in God but also someone in your shoes. When a man looks at another woman in lust, the Bible says that it is just as bad as him actually sleeping with her. ( I believe that goes for women as well) We should consider this first. Then I think as someone who has also viewed porn shameldy, we must consider it's effects. This type of behavior can progress into other things or it doesn't have to. I personally have felt insecurities knowing that my husband has looked upon porn and masturbated. For instance : why should he when I am avalable and more than willing? Well because, it is something he has done for a long time and is easy for him. He has no commitment with masturbating. It takes less time. The kids don't interrupt. So on. Friend, I urge you to examine yourself with the porn, never watch it with him, and pray to God and ask to show you a better way. This is only my opinion and my own treatment. Porn is unholy and God will judge us in the end.