Shoulf she be open and honest or am i asking too much

[plehpleh]

My gf is a very closed person and would rather Bottle things up rather than be open and honest with me.

Examples:

I watched footy round a friend's one Saturday and she didn't message saying she would prefer me home to help her out but was then a little off with me later because I stayed out, I did say to her I will come home or stay out completely up to her!! I dropped her 4yr old to dance class then stayed round friends watching footy as it was close to the dance to then pick the girl up after.

My gf was at home looking after our baby.

 

We had a row the other day and it just ended as I was asking difficult questions then she flipped out and got really mad and whacked the wall and we didn't conclude the argument.

 

She's isn't sure if some of her friends are legit or just using her when there bored or lonely, I said to ask them, be open and honest... she would rather let the course run however it will run rather than find out now.

 

She got married even though she knew it wouldn't last.

 

My worry is that if she isn't open and honest with me now expressing her feelings or thoughts that it will lead to more negative things or lieing or deciept or just like living alone with someone as communication is not open and honest.

 

Am I asking too much wanting her to be open with me or is she wrong being fairly closed with me???

[DancingFool]

You are correct to want what you want. That said, your gf is not a person who will communicate well or openly or at all it seems. So you can want her to be different until the cows come home, but it's not going to happen. She is who she is and you can't change her. Either you accept her as is or you walk away because who she is, isn't working out for you.

[plehpleh]

Thanks for your response dancingfool, I believe your right in what you wrote I just feel if i/we don't do anything then there could be underlying issues that could one day explode you know....

Or we can both learn to change a little and hopefully try to deal with and issues that may be present...

I'm worried that her being closed will continue and grow so that she rarely opens up to me and this could lead to lies....