I Can't Stand To Be Around My Mom

[Sunny1008]

Hi all,

 

I love my mom, but over the past several months, it has been increasingly difficult for me to be around her. Every little thing she does gets on my nerves. She is divorced from my dad, and not remarried. She has been retired for many years. She doesn't really do anything all day except for knit and watch politics. She has little to no social interaction with anyone except for me. She can be very negative and controlling. And she's practically a hermit. She doesn't even have a smart phone. She is living in the dark ages. I have tried to help her with suggestions, but she's stubborn as a mule.

 

I don't know how to maintain a relationship with her without becoming completely unglued from frustration. Most of our interactions end with me leaving completely annoyed and saying something rude to her. Please help!

[DanZee]

My mother's similar. I know her heart's in the right place so I just ignore anything negative. Just agree with her and be calm. The fact that you've visited is usually the point not what she said to you. Maybe try keeping the visits short. She's not really looking for you to solve her problems. That's the you're from Mars, she's from Venus sort of thing. Just agree with her and don't take the bait. You'll both enjoy the visit better.