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I met my girlfriend on New Year's Day and everything has been fantastic. On our 5 month anniversary I picked her up to go to Church and she tells me wants to break up to get back together with her ex-boyfriend of 3 months from 12 months before when he dumped her (devastated her).

She is moving 5600 miles away in three weeks and we were planning on moving together. She still talks to me everyday and this Sunday when we went to Church she tearfully told me that things were not the same as they had been when she was with him before and that she had told him it wasnt working and she wanted to just be single. She was holding my hand several times after Church and I am confused by her behavior. A day later she told me she got back together with him again. I ask her a lot of tough questions and she gets exhausted but answers them. She says she loves him as well as me but then when she put the qualities she looks for in a man I beat him handily. How can I help her overcome her unhealthy love for him?

He is a smart young doctor but rather arrogant, jealous and immature. Her major issues with him were his lack of affection and spirituality, obviously important and hard to fake over the long haul.

I am hoping that when she moves cross country that she settles down her confusion and has a clearer head. Now he says he is planning on moving there in a year.

How can I snap her back to reality and get a clue. We never had a single argument and always joked about never having to have "the dreaded talk". Is she just flipping out because she is preparing to move and she is going to miss her friends including him and how do I get her to let go of this past love? She's not being rational.

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I think that by if you mean devastating talk, that she needs to wake up and realize that mans not good for her. He's putting her through so much pain. I don't know how you should talk to her, but have that "devastating talk" and make her understand, that you arne't saying she has to come back to you, but that she understands that hes hurting her. and uuh by the way sorry I am so bad at this advice stuff, its my first time giving advice at this place, and I am only a teen. umm, so I think you should stop beating around the bush so to speak, and confront her about it. instead of just joking around.

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