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Is it normal that i still miss him ? does he ?


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t is been more than 1 month & 3 weeks now after my break-up with my Ex-Fiance. The first 2 weeks were really really painful. I don't think i ever stopped crying. After those 2 next weeks, i started feeling better but still numb & bitter. We broke up because we had a fight & he accused me that i threw tantrums at him while i did not. He hurt me big time. am from the middleast & my ex-fiance is from the US, we met in UK, & immediately fell in love, he moved to my country to be with me.We got engaged after 6 months & we were planning to live in Europe. Everything was going so smooth until one day we had a big fight on very silly reasons & he left back to his country & broke up with me saying we dont culturally click, that nothing is wrong with me but we just are culturally different. I was shocked because our relationship was so special & we never talked about us being culturally different and it was never a deal breaker for us. We simply used to merge both our cultures so we can create the best of both. I was devastated when he said it is impossible to fix it and even though he loves me so much but he is thinking about the future positive outcome. After almost 1 month now from the breakup, i started the moving on process, started yoga, jogging, going out with friends, going on dates, whitened my teeth, new hair style, but at the end of the day I always ask myself why he didnt work on our relationship, why can someone that claimed to love me so much, leave so easily. A little background about him: he is divorced, his parents are divorced. He only said its culture but i dont think this is the reason.

 

Well my e-fiance & i had to communicate about how i have to ship his stuff & how i should sell the rings & transfer him back the money ( my idea ) but he accused me that i am forcing a conversation by talking about stuff shipment so I had to cut off the communication so i can start moving on & he hurt me more by telling me this since even though he broke my heart i was still willing to ship all his clothes & ring money but he accused me that i am forcing a conversation. So 2 week ago i had to cut off communication like i said before & i told him when i move on in the next upcoming year i will talk to him about the shipment logistics since i wont keep his stuff as hostage. He never replied back then & i really felt better since i really needed to stop talking to him if i really wanted to move on. I really worked on myself those past weeks & had really good days where i started feeling relieved. On the other hand, I am still going through those hard days where I cant stop thinking about us , the reason why he left me this way, about the pain i went through and still slightly going through. I always feel like i was convicted in a trial even though i am innocent & i had to deal with this. I cant get over the idea of how unfair this breakup was. Cant get over this abandonment feeling.

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Having a difference in culture can cause problems in a relationship. This guy has obviously come from a background were people leave when things get hard. ie he is divorced, his parents are divorced. When someone shows you who they are believe them . You have dodged a bullet in my opinion. Would you have rather married this guy, had some kids and when things really got hard and your romance was not the same, would you have rather he left you then?

 

Burn his things or better yet sell them all and keep the money, he deserves nothing from you at this point. You tried to do the right thing by him and he just accused you of trying to force the conversation! He is a real d-bag. Since he broke off the engagement and up and moved away you can sell the rings and also keep the money. That is custom in all cultures.

 

You need to implement NC for this guy and it will be easy because you live so far away from each other.

 

Focus on yourself and everything will eventually fall into place for you. I am wishing all good things your way...best of luck.

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Thank you for your considerate advice. That is true, he showed me his true colors at our very first fight. I know i will move on, I know it will get easier. As per his stuff, haha hell yes i will sell them & i am buying new stuff for me. I will sell the rings & i will donate his clothes & other stuff for a charity. His breakup was extremely unfair, that's why i was dwelling on it for quiet a little bit of time. But what i care most about now is to get out of the whole situation with least damages since i feel that this is my first breakup that makes me fear to go into another relationship.

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