AN Posted June 10, 2003 Share Posted June 10, 2003 I'm so lonely. Why am I like this? Why can't I change? I try to be more charming. I say hi to people now...sometimes I smile... but nothing changes. I still fear talking to people. It's so hard going through life all alone. I have one friend, but he's not real-real, he's just a person I met online. We've been friends for 3 years now but we're growing up and he's drifting away. My parents are starting to notice I have no friends and that makes me even more miserable. Why are some people born this way? What have I done to live out this punishment? Link to comment
dude123 Posted June 10, 2003 Share Posted June 10, 2003 Look don't give up. Im sure that u must have friends. I dunno if u go to school or not but school is the best place to make friends. In all the classes that u are all the people that u see everday. Im sure that there are people out there that want to talk to u. U just need to show a little more intrest in life. Be happy and see how people react to that. Good Luck to you my friend. ! ! ! Link to comment
rachelalyse8 Posted June 10, 2003 Share Posted June 10, 2003 Hey hun. This really hurts me when I read this because I'm sure you are a sweet and wonderful person. It is hard to be outgoing and make friends. I had so much trouble growing up. I was so unsociable and my parents worried so much about me because I didn't have barely any friends. It's hard, but you will get through it. Just take things slow. Try to talk to some new people. I hope you feel better Link to comment
perhaps Posted June 10, 2003 Share Posted June 10, 2003 The person I love the most in the world would describe herself just as you do. You might want to look at allowing yourself to be loved. Stop worrying about being antisocial and open your eyes to all the wonderful people you reject. I picked her because I too have a hard time receiving. Allow yourself to be loved by people who know you arent perfect. There is a person for everybody. I found mine but I will find another one someday. Just hang in there and be good to yourself. No matter how antisocial you are there will always be people who love you. Link to comment
jl_gal Posted June 10, 2003 Share Posted June 10, 2003 I used to be the same and than this antisocial thing cause me to have hatred for those who doesn't accept me.However today i am on the process of curing. Enough about me but i have an advice take into mind that u should aviod this anger as it will only draw u deeper in ya problem What u should do is??? 1. write a list of con and pro on urself. Then try to change all the con into pro. 2. be confident as people only respect u if u respect urself(reminder don't be to the extreme as u might turn out arrogant) 3.about the fear of talking to someone this might because u fear of rejection. So tell urself what is the worse that could happen if u are rejected and ready urself for that rejection. 4. Join clubs or activity to meet more people 5. try not to try to hard to please others cause thiis might make u artificial or ppl might take advantage on ur weakness. 6. Practice all this as practice makes perfect GOOD LUCK If u wanna know more contact me at email removed Link to comment
khiron Posted June 10, 2003 Share Posted June 10, 2003 The loneliness associated with being antisocial can also lead to depression, a problem I've had. I make sure to take a B Complex vitamin supplement daily, and to get 20-30m of intensive exercise twice weekly. Exercise can also be an activity to broaden your social horizons. Link to comment
Getting On With It Posted June 10, 2003 Share Posted June 10, 2003 Not knowing you from Adam, I'm not going to make any assumptions about who you are as a person, what your habits are, or whether you are actually antisocial -- but I can offer you some advice that will pay off over time. smile -- not just sometimes! There are two reasons: (a) the body has a physiological response to smiling, so the act, believe it or not, actually makes you happier; and (b) people who smile are perceived as friendly and more approachable. Make it a habit. get out -- I strongly recommend you take up dancing via classes, or some similar activity. It's not important that you are any good -- indeed, having two left feet is a bonus, as it will cause other people to interact with you... that's a surprisingly good ice-breaker. Futhermore, the environment has 'rules' that encourage interaction: it's rude to turn down a request for a dance, and it's rude not to ask a lady to dance! chill out -- the more you worry about being lonely, the more you will depress yourself and become unapproachable. Doing this is probably as simple as being happy that you are on the road out of the position you are in. So, put together a plan: start by setting yourself the task of finding activities for at least 4 of the 7 days of the week that gets you out of the house. Maybe, having started with the dancing, you get on with some of the people there, and meet up as a group at a weekend... be interested -- when talking to people, be interested in them, and they'll be interested in you. If you don't know someone, just introduce yourself (you'll be surprised how easy this becomes when you've done it a few times: just 'Hi, I'm Bob/Joan' and a handshake does it). Once you know their name, it gets easier ('Hi John/Billy-Jean, haven't seen you in a while. How are you keeping?'). It'll just go from there. look after yourself -- whilst it's a miserable truth, people do run on appearance. You don't have to be the best looking bloke/gal in the world, but you do have to give enough of a hoot about yourself to be clean and tidy. If you don't care about yourself, why should anyone else! I hope that my list proves useful to you -- oh, and for heaven's sake, don't pass up on the opportunity to talk to email removed 8) Link to comment
Rocky_Stallone Posted June 11, 2003 Share Posted June 11, 2003 I used to be anti-social when I was younger but I got over it as I got older. I am no longer a shy person. I talk to people all the time now. Overcoming shyness is very simple. All you need to do is just walk up to someone and start a conversation. People are not going to bite. Link to comment
AN Posted June 11, 2003 Author Share Posted June 11, 2003 I know they don't bite, but I don't think you get it. It's VERY uncomfortable. Then I start sweating and frustrated over what to say next. Each second of silent seems like hours to me then I start looking away. A weird feeling will rush over me and the conversation will eventually go no where. I end up creeping out people and I'm so tired of it. Link to comment
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