Phoning or Texting Mind Games?

[bobster]

If anyone read my last topic problem in:

 

link removed

 

then you will probably know the situation I'm in now.

 

The problem I have is that when I phoned this girl on the Saturday morning after the night before to have a serious talk we both aggreed that Text messages were not a good idea for in depth topics. So during the week I was thinking of phoning her when I received a text saying that she was staying at home for another week and would be back at the weekend. I then text her back saying give me a call sometime.......Should I have phoned her or ignored her? Last night I was lying in bed thinking how she hasn't phoned so I text her (was that bad?) but I said that I'd speak to her soon.

 

Just hate these "mind games" as I think of them, any advice anyone?

[DN]

Never play mind-games with someone. Nobody knows what the rules are or even if you are playing the same game. Is it is her turn to contact you, wait until she does. If she does not - move on. Nobody is worth all the bs, especially before a relationship has even started.

[providentielle]

I know how you feel here, for me it often has something to do with insecurity. You were right to text back, ignoring her wouldn't have got you anywhere. I think you just want to talk to her but feel like the ball is in hre court now which is frustrating, I know. The best thing is to wait and hope she calls, but try not to think about it too much because you will go slowly crazy! lol If she hasn't called after the time she said you'd be at home then you could give her a ring, but remember that she may not have called for a reason. Good luck

[bobster]

yeah I know what you mean providentielle, can't help thinking I've caused all this...

 

she is at her parents for another week (she lives in the east coast and I'm in the west) at least she told me that, means she is thnking about me, she did say that she needed time to think about things (ah the old saying eh ) but this time I just have the vibe that she actually does.....and because of the situation of the week before is kinda scared to call me?

[providentielle]

Things from the previous week could have made it difficult and confused the situation more. As ever I think you just have to be honest with her, tell her if you want a relationship and then you both know where you stand

[bobster]

yeah, I had a text from her and think we will talk soon. Kind of think the ball is still in her court but I suppose I should take the lead.....your righ though, Honesty is the key

[bobster]

Just to Update:

 

We did talk on the phone last week (I called her) she seemed kind of cold on the phone and when I asked her out she said "ok that sounds great, looking forward to it" She gae me her email address to email her with a definate time during the week. We exchanged a couple of short emails.

less than 24hrs before our date she text and emailed me and called it off saying she had assignments t do for Uni. So I emailed and text her saying we'll go out after her studies.

 

I text her last night after having no response form her asking if she wants to go for a date next Wed/Thursday and I still have had no response from her.

 

The question(s) is: If any of you were asked out on a date by either text or email would you respond? How do I take this then? I know I should just moove on but its hard because of the situations we have shared.

 

A reason I didn't phone her is in case I was disturbing her studies (I know they uesd to disrupt my study).

 

Any ideas?

[yahoo2]

Yes. Leave her alone for awhile. You're being gamed or she is just not interested. Canceling at the last minute and not returning your request for a date was sending you a definite message, and you're not getting it.

 

Going away is the only thing to do now. If she tries to contact you it will explain things. So will not contacting you.

 

Going away means to contact whatsoever.

 

Get it?

[bobster]

I take it you mean NO contact whatsoever?

 

I think I'll do just that.