Ok need some relationship advice

[vik]

I like a girl who also likes me. The problem is that

she was engaged sometime ago and her engagement

broke because the guy was abroad and met someone there

and married. She was heart-broken. Now she thinks

im a great guy and all that but she doesn't want to

marry or even get engaged

 

how do I convince her?

[Nifty_Swifty1]

Well, at the moment you aren't even dating, so it's a little early to worry about getting married. Take it one step at a time. In a good relationship the apprehension should lessen.

[Meow18]

There's no reason to think about marriage before even dating her. I think the more she gets to know you, the more she will trust you.

 

She was hurt in the past by someone she was engaged to. I can see why she would be scared to get into that again. However, if you start dating and you realize that she is "the one" for you, then she'll will feel better about it all.

 

What you don't want to do is tell her that you want to marry her and that she's the one you want to be with forever if there's doubt in your mind that it is true. It will just scare her away from marriage even more.

 

Just get to know her, date her.. and in a couple of years, see where you are.

[OceanEyes]

Wow! It's way too early to start thinking about getting engaged to a girl who just had her heart broken. In time, she will heal and begin to see things in a new light. Of course, this may take years.

 

The best way to work towards a future with a girl like this is to just let things happen, always show her respect, and never push anything on her. She's obviously been through quite a bit, so her saying, "I am never getting engaged/ married again" is pretty normal. I say "I'm never drinking again" on those mornings when my head is pounding from a hangover. It usually doesn't stop me from drinking the following weekend when I feel better though.

[DN]

did she say she didn't want to marry or get engaged in a general sense or because you asked her to marry you?

 

If it was just general conversation (i.e. she was venting a bit) thats a different thing than a response to a proposal.