How many times can you say good-bye?

[jessijess]

Well the guy I've been dating (nothing serious due to the circumstances described below) called me the other day to tell me that he's leaving Saturday afternoon for Iraq. I knew since the day I met him that he was going to be leaving shortly after returning to base in Georgia. he promised to call me before he left though. Well he called me this afternoon to say good-bye & to tell me that he;s leaving at 4am instead (about 5 1/2 hours from now). I made him promise to be safe & to tell a mutual friend of ours to let me know if he heard anything about my guy (Josh).

He just called me again as he's getting all his stuff together to talk to me some more. & he said he's going to call me again later after he's packed & he's dropped his stuff off at the storage shed. I told him to call me at whatever time he wanted because I know I'm not going to get to hear his voice again for the next 14 months.

Everytime I've talked to him since finding out when he's leaving, has gotten harder & harder. he keeps calling me sweetheart & telling me that when he gets back we're getting together no matter what. When I had to say good-bye to him in person he told me that if he wasn't leaving, he could see himself falling in love with me.

Since we've only known each other about a month & only been physically together (near each other) for 2 weeks, we're not waiting for each other/ But I think I can totally see myself falling for him more than I ever wanted to. Does anyone have words of wisdom on surviving being away from someone you care about for so long? Or anyone think I'm nuts for even thinking about this so-called relationship?

Thanks everyone!

[Midvalley]

You're not nuts, not only do you have something but its also very intriguing so its only potential but in the process of igniting.

The time he's away wont be easy, not at all, but its still possible. You may want to get your real feelings out in the open before he goes, dont hold onto that while hes away, you'll go crazy.

Remember to trust him, even if he betrays your trust you suffer a better fate then if you never gave it. Keep in contact as often as possible and be true to him by being true to yourself. Most importantly dont panic, 14 months is a long time, but youve got a long life ahead of you, its okay to wait.

[jessijess]

Thanks midvalley. I haven't had a LRD since I was 19 & that was only for 2 months (but again due to the military).

But I think I'm going to wait until a letter to tell him how I feel. I definatly wont do it in an email (waaaayyyyy to impersonal) For some reason I feel like hand written letters are alot more personal.

I;m one of those really outgoing shy people. Outgoing to the world but when it comes to my feelings, I'm really very shy.

[Midvalley]

Sounds like a good idea to me. I wish you both the best. Remember that love comes naturally, relationships dont, you've got to work for your want, have conviction. If you can handle 14 months in a LDR, I think you guys will be set for a life together, assuming you want that. Just think about how much fun you'll have when he gets back, like discovering a love you've always had.

[lisica]

You aren't nuts, you have a crush and it's ok to follow your heart and your belly, even though your mind and maybe your friends say that it is kind of crazy. Because you have only been together shortly, it seems difficult to ask each other exclusivety and to promise that you will wait for each other (you prolly both want to promise it but your minds are saying that it is irrational). However something which you can do, is promise each other that you will tell the other as soon as you should start developing feelings for someone else. This promise can give you some peace of mind.

 

For the rest, time will tell. It is not going to be easy, so make sure to keep yourself busy to take your mind of him a bit. Also people at this forum are here to help you through difficult moments. Hey and guess what: the countdown to seeing him the next time has already started!!