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help! please! advice please!!

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i am 14 and i went to this school dance, i didnt dance with anyone , partly because of the crappy music, you couldnt dance to it!ok well i also think its because of my wieght, i am 5 3" and 135lbs. i think i have a low self -esteem, i am very self conscious, i tell my self i am over wieght because of my underactive thyroid gland, (it means my metabolism and growth hasnt been working) but i have been taking medicine for htat and i had expected it to make me really skinny but it hasnt, my dad makes me more self conscious be asking me if i have gained weight, he says it like i need to work out more, not like -woah you look fatter- but it still makes me very mad and sad. i have never had a boyfriend and i dont consider myself popular at all but i am good friends with the popular people, they are my crowd. i feel so self conscious and have tried starvation diets and other things before, but nothing works, i dont want to tell my parets that i want to go on a regular diet, because i am not comfortable doing that but i really need help please give my your advice!

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i dont want to tell my parets that i want to go on a regular diet


why would you not want to talk to your parents about helping you eat right, or get regular exercise?


lil, talking to your parents about helping you is the most grown up & responsible thing to do. Your dad comments because he is concerned about you, and your health...if you are on thyroid medication as it is, not taking care of yourself can lead to worse problems. It takes more than a pill to get yourself healthy and to lose weight...your lifestyle has to change as well...and considering you live with your parents and they probably control a lot of what you eat and do...they are the people to talk to about it...along with your doctor.


For your age & height, based on doctor BMI charts (body mass index) you are a bit overweight...but it is nothing that can't be easily taken care of, provided you do something about it now.

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my dad lives in a different town and he is basically the only one who makes me eat right, he cooks for me. my mom works all day and we are struggling with money and things so she is always stressed and exhaused so the first thing she does when she gets home is she grabs some food and sits down, watches tv and eats, she eats to ease her feelings, she eats to make herself feel better, then at night she takes food up to her room and eats, she isnt giant and its not like she doesnt excercize and she doesnt eat 24/7 but she buys alot of unhealthy food that i eat too, also just sayin but the medicine isnt to make my thyroid more active then its supposed to be its to make it work normal amount, and i have a low metablolism besides that.. thank you for the advice thoough but i still dont know what to do

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you need to talk to your dad about what is going on at your mom's house and how you need to be eating better. Let him help you deal with her.


If he has to, he can take you to the doctor himself and get a diet and exercise program set up for you that your mom will have to stick to.


Would you be opposed to moving to his house instead of living with your mom if she won't take care of you properly?

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my mom is a great mom, she takes care of me great, she just has a full day then comes home from an exhausting day and doesnt take care of herself well, in the other reply i posted i made her sound really bad like she ate all the time which she doesnt.... i cant talk to my dad about it, or my mom, its too embarrassing and my dad doesnt let me talk if i try to talk to him, i am not seeing a doctor until it progresses until i cant controll anyhting, i think i will get like a weight watchers or an atkins book or something and dont let my parents see it then follow the book by myself

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how are you supposed to follow a diet book if you can't buy the food for it?


What is more embarrassing? being teased at school or talking to your mom?


Your mom isn't going to make you feel bad for wanting to be healthy! If anything, it will make the two of you closer because BOTH of you can work on getting healthy, together. It's a known fact having someone to diet or exercise with makes it easier, and helps motivate you.

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i actually think talking to my mom is harder, i just cant talk to her, one of my sisters can but i just cant... the only person i can talk to about it is my larger friend.... i also could buy the food for it or at least ask my mom to buy it, i could buy it instead of clothes, we get a large monthly allowance i could use........ i just cant talk to my mom.... i kno it sounds like it would be simple for me to just talk to her but its not

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if you ask your mom to buy the food she is going to ask why...so you will have to talk about it.


if you buy healthy food yourself it will have to be put in the fridge and your mom will ask why it is there.


(are you getting the picture that that talking to your mom is somewhat unavoidable?)


If your sister can talk to you mom, why not ask your sister to talk to her for you...OR write a letter to your mom...explaining everything.


I can see where talking to your mom about sex and boys and things likethat could be embarrassing...but lil, this is about potato chips and lettuce...big difference there

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