Selflove1 Posted February 22, 2014 Share Posted February 22, 2014 I guess that's the aftermath of infidelity. Not just during through the course of trying to fix the relationship, it was much worse then and I struggled to keep my thoughts from tumbling through my mouth, and although now it's over, which I know in my head for sure my heart is still having a bit of trouble, I cannot seem to shift my thoughts. He's out having a blast, just like he was those lasts months I thought we were trying. He's meeting women, Los of sex and laughs and social life. My very vivid imagination is going wild, down to the details of the way I know he flirts all the way to his face when he ejavulates. (50 shades of crazy that me lol) It's none of my business anymore. So he can do that. He's free to do that. Your choosing not to do that, and you will feel better for it. So what if he's going hotels? It's not for you to know about, even if u did know it would only make you feel worse. So why can't I stop myself? One things I have managed to control is that I no longer interrogate him about anything when we have to be around each other (children) I know longer question about the women he cheated with, I no longer pry about his weekends, or who he talks to. Don't get me wrong tho, id love to lol! Sometimes I'm itching to go through his phone, everything, I have to leave the room sometime to stop myself asking something that I know even if igot the answer I wanted id still think it a lie. So I guess . I dunno . It's part of the healing process. Sometimes I feel very bitter that he's out all the time courting and flirting and socialising with all these people always thinking about who can bed next, the thrill of being naked with someone new, the ego of great sex with hot chicks, even though I don't know if this is happening or not it doesn't soothe my brain. Ahh ... Not my business anymore. Nope nope nope. One my head and heart become allies then I will know peace inside Link to comment
Rabbit 5 Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 Sorry I can't shear any light but you should become a writer Link to comment
Amy Brock Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 My imagination gets the best of me, too. I know how my ex got to me and I know that's exactly how he ended up with his new girl. Mine played the pity card. "She left me... I'm so miserable... I'm just a piece of sh*t". Then she responds "no you're not... She didn't know what she lost"... He has a pattern about him. Now *I* know why his exes left him. She will know eventually. So, yes... I can play this in my mind. I'm so there. Link to comment
silversoul Posted February 23, 2014 Share Posted February 23, 2014 Was he your only bf? You think of him this way because you only have been with him, not because he's so special. Fantasize about your future great partner Link to comment
Selflove1 Posted February 23, 2014 Author Share Posted February 23, 2014 Sorry I can't shear any light but you should become a writer That's probably the highest compliments I've been paid, thank you lol Link to comment
Selflove1 Posted February 23, 2014 Author Share Posted February 23, 2014 Was he your only bf? You think of him this way because you only have been with him, not because he's so special. Fantasize about your future great partner Yes he was my only real long term relationship, the others were just flings as we got together at 18 and broke up and 23, so first proper break up aswell. I do fantasise about the future, sometimes it's a about meeting someone great who loves me as much as I loved the ex, most of the time it's just about me being in a great place without the heaving feeling on my shoulders or the permanent sadness on my face lol Thanks for replys Link to comment
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