NinjaLink Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Everything is fine. Link to comment
Altoidbox Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 I used to be made fun of in school, and the best thing that I can tell you is to just ignore everyone when they are making fun of you. Getting angry and getting into fights is just going to make things worse and will provoke people to make fun of you even more. People have probably figured out that it is easy to get you upset and have taken advantage of that. Just try to ignore these people, they just have not grown up yet. Link to comment
NinjaLink Posted November 30, 2004 Author Share Posted November 30, 2004 i dont know anymore. Link to comment
NinjaLink Posted November 30, 2004 Author Share Posted November 30, 2004 i have to many problems in my life, and if they keep doing it...i feel like i have to take it out on them...i dont want to or anything, but they are forcing me to. Link to comment
NinjaLink Posted November 30, 2004 Author Share Posted November 30, 2004 I'll keep trying to ignore them, i dont think it will work any longer.. Link to comment
zab Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 this may not be the best reply to this and people will most likely disagree but that happened to me back in the day, and to get through it i had a fight with the main person who started it all and beat him down badly...hospitalized....but im not saying go this far...just stand up for yourself...yeh ignoring it sounds easy but its hard when it happens all the time and it gets to you whether u let it or not because its continually in your ear and you start thinking...'am i really dumb' etc just stand up for yourself and if need be beat down the main person but out of college grounds.....just something light...hope that helps Link to comment
sole Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 I agree with zab. . I was in your shoes in grade school and ignoring it won't help. You don't need to fight but at least stand up for yourself. Don't stay quiet when they talk bad to you or about you. Tell them they need to grow up and have a good comeback ready so you can make them look stupid! Link to comment
DBL Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 I would grab their most respected, smack him around a bit OFF CAMPUS! No sense in ruining your education. Or atleast get him by himself and ask what his problem is, and ask if he would like to settle right now. Don't go whining to your girlfriend about it either...that just shows weakness. Some people just don't know better not to mess with someone, no matter how many warnings you give. Sometimes it is best to clip it early on instead of letting them build off of what you give them. DBL Link to comment
Beec Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 Well, one of the thigns I find is that if I make fun of myself, then no one wants to make fun of me, because it does not bother me. For instance, I have a good memory, read a ton, love history and can generally take anyone apart in games involving trivia. I've had groups of people that just refuse to play with me around. I know sometimes people will want to make fun of that or try to take me down a peg because of it. If I make fun of me "being generally full of useless knowledge", then they seem to not want to do it anymore. I've found this works well with women. Laugh at yourself, that they seem to find you more attractive. If you really need to resolve this in a violent way, which has backfired on me before, then pick out the biggest or toughest guy and try to intimidate or provoke him. Make fun of him for having equipment the size of a needle or something. I've also found that once you take on the biggest guy around, no one else wants to try. Finally, I'd recommend you read "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie. It might help you avoid all this. Link to comment
Strictly4MyGrind Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 kickin tha crap out one of them may stop him but it wnt stop them all now wil it? the exact same thing use to happen to me and because i lost my temper so easily it was funny to them they did it more.. ignorin them may stop it but here wat i did make fun out of them bad....i bet half of them dnt have a gurl u do use it against them. childdish but it worked 4 me laugh at them take fun bak make them feel like you do...make them feel worse it worked for me Link to comment
OmegaMan Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 This is a good question. Option A: Most politically correct people would say, just ignore them. But the price to pay for staying quiet when people are insulting you and spitting on your dignity is high: SELF-ESTEEM. You have to protect your self-esteem with everything you got. Too much insult, and you will bad because you allowed so many people to walk on your back. This is what I did, I didn't say a word, but it ruined me for years inside. Option B: Smash their face in. Satisfying but: 1-You might get your own @ss kicked. 2-You might seriously hurt someone and be sued. 3-Just because you beat someone up doesn't mean the whole deal is solved afterwards. Actually the conflict might turn even more vicious. So you see, fighting has it's advantages, but also has risks. Option C: Gain their respect. By blowing up and getting affected by their comments, you just show weakness. I am often with people in conflict in my job. I sometimes use the paradox, in other words, the complete opposite as to what they are expecting. If someone tells you: "I hate you, you're ugly." You could reply with something like Well I thought you were I kind of cool and I'm sorry you see me this way." Believe it or not this reply is gold. It's kind of passive-aggressive but it makes the other person realise how cheap and vile they are. Not only do you tell them you like them when they insult you, not only do you tell them that you're sorry they see you that way (in other words, you are informing them this doesn't affect you but still consider their opinion). This gives the person the impression of guilt and realise of how uncalled for the reaction is. I kind of like Option C. I think it's brilliant and very strategic. Gives the impression of defence whereas it also acts as an indirect offense. Option D: Talk to them. This is an instance where I don't believe in communication. I've tried it. They tell you they're sorry when you are by yourself by re-start the same thing when they are with other people. It's up to you buddy. Etienne Link to comment
Altoidbox Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 I don't think violence will solve anything, it will just make things worse. Since the teachers are not stepping in, I suggest that you either go to higher authorities like the Principal, or transfer to another school. Link to comment
dirtbubble Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 This is a little confusing because your post says you are having trouble in college, but almost all the trouble and advice sound like public school trouble. If you fight in a college class you may get kicked out and expelled with no refund, especially if you injure someone. You may be sued or even face criminal charges. Are those consequences you can live with? I agree if you bum rush the insitigator, tackle him OFF CAMPUS. Anyway, you're in college now so it's time to figure out how to settle your frustrations in other ways besides violence. What are you going to do when you are 35? Are you still going to be waxing guys who show you disrespect? That's a good way to find out what the word incarceration means. Get more creative with your frustration and anger. Grow up. Link to comment
NinjaLink Posted November 30, 2004 Author Share Posted November 30, 2004 I need to grow up? you know nothing about me. Link to comment
NinjaLink Posted November 30, 2004 Author Share Posted November 30, 2004 and no i'm not whining to my girlfriend Link to comment
NinjaLink Posted November 30, 2004 Author Share Posted November 30, 2004 if you are just going to bash me, why even bother to try to help me? Link to comment
dirtbubble Posted November 30, 2004 Share Posted November 30, 2004 True, I know nothing about you except what you tell us. What you told us is some people made you angry and and you want to put them on ice. At first it seemed like and expression, but then you make it sound very serious. All of the talk sounds like grade school nonsense, except now you are a grown man, making you more dangerous. I don't like people making assumptions about me, either. After all, some of us have a fairly complex circumstances which are hard to explain. But often ithe advice that makes you the most angry is really what you need. Only you can decide. If the trite phrase bothers you, I apologize. Let's put it another way: beating people down won't make you less angry. Beating people down won't make people think better of you. Beating people down won't stop people from treating you badly. Overcome your anger and transcend your need for retaliation and you will gain much more fulfilling satisfaction and triumph over these and other enemies you will encounter in life. If others think you are stupid and ostracize you now, don't expect a schoolyard brawl to improve their attitudes. Link to comment
nexus532 Posted December 1, 2004 Share Posted December 1, 2004 Weird at the my college everyone tends to keep to themselves. Link to comment
NinjaLink Posted December 1, 2004 Author Share Posted December 1, 2004 I dont see why i attract enemies now. I never attracted enemies before. I'm a nice guy. Link to comment
NinjaLink Posted December 1, 2004 Author Share Posted December 1, 2004 Besides this situation, i just have alot going on through my mind about a lot of things... Things that are just not good things, and it hurts me inside. I dont even like going to the school I'm at because I never chose to go. I wanted to be in a university, not a community college. Sometimes i feel like i should just give up. I feel i already messed up my school life. There are just a lot of things going through my mind about all things, and them doing that to me is just making things worst. I don't mean to sound like i'm a child when i say i will hurt them, i just feel that way. Sometimes you end up taking out your problems on someone...and that is something i dont want to do. Link to comment
OmegaMan Posted December 1, 2004 Share Posted December 1, 2004 You know, the worst thing anyone could do just now is take you in pity. You are living what hundreds of thousands of human beings are living every day of the year. There is nothing worse when people take you in pity, it just doesn't help and it makes you perceive your reality in an even more dramatic way (sometimes leagues away from reality). I would recommend seeing a psychologist. I am seeing one weekly and I am beginning to understand so many things. Once you understand how your mind works, It's easier to fix it. Etienne Link to comment
sole Posted December 1, 2004 Share Posted December 1, 2004 Besides this situation, i just have alot going on through my mind about a lot of things... Things that are just not good things, and it hurts me inside. I dont even like going to the school I'm at because I never chose to go. I wanted to be in a university, not a community college. Sometimes i feel like i should just give up. I feel i already messed up my school life. There are just a lot of things going through my mind about all things, and them doing that to me is just making things worst. I don't mean to sound like i'm a child when i say i will hurt them, i just feel that way. Sometimes you end up taking out your problems on someone...and that is something i dont want to do. You can change things. If you're unhappy with school, then transfer to univ. I know a lot of people who went to community college for a year to raise their grades befire transferring to univ. I think it's easier to get a scholarship from univ. if you make good grades at community than in high school. As soon as you transfer to univ. you'll probably get to meet more mature individuals too. If you want to take your frustrations out on someone try working out or taking boxing classes. Link to comment
NinjaLink Posted December 2, 2004 Author Share Posted December 2, 2004 That is defiantely not a bad idea. I am planning to transfer after getting a degree from where I am. Right now, I go to school under a scholarship. I do get good grades. Last semester, i got a 3.70 gpa. I'm in my 2nd year of college right now, but you know all different fields vary on how long it takes for you to graduate. I believe i have 2 more semesters before i get a degree and move on finally. I can't wait. Link to comment
sole Posted December 2, 2004 Share Posted December 2, 2004 That is defiantely not a bad idea. I am planning to transfer after getting a degree from where I am. Right now, I go to school under a scholarship. I do get good grades. Last semester, i got a 3.70 gpa. I'm in my 2nd year of college right now, but you know all different fields vary on how long it takes for you to graduate. I believe i have 2 more semesters before i get a degree and move on finally. I can't wait. WOW! 3.7 is great. Then you should have no problem getting another scholarship for univ. And then you'll only have 2 years at Univ., because you'll get major univ. credit towards your Bachelors degree based on the credit you've earned at community. As for the upcoming year, don't let those losers stop you from getting to where you want to go. Stand up for yourself without using physical violence. Link to comment
NinjaLink Posted December 2, 2004 Author Share Posted December 2, 2004 Thanks. I won't. They dont really do it anymore anyway though. If they do it again, i'll just ignore them. Thanks Link to comment
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