Just a question

[suzysuzy]

I am wondering when will a guy loose interest in a girl if he keeps showing emotions towards her but she didn't show any feelings towards him?

[Mr. Cactus]

What an excellent quesion I think you will find the answer is "how long is a piece of string". But for what it is worth, I'll give you my personal experience. About 4 months is about as long as I have lasted before I declare my pursuit is not going to bring any results or reciprocation on the part of the other person. Although there was an older women once who I think I did not give up on for a couple of years! But that really was the exception. Looking back on that particular episode, I really wonder what the heck was going through my head!

 

Anyway, I can't wait to see other people's replies. What is the record going to be I wonder?

[Beachgirl11]

suzysuzy.....

 

That is a good question. I was just in that exact situation. I'm a female and was casually seeing (well, casual on my part) this guy who was 8 years older than I and he was in the process of going through a divorce. He had just moved out on his wife 3 months before I started seeing him (his wife wanted the divorce after 20 years of marriage). I think he was so used to the companionship of someone else that he wanted to jump right back into a relationship again with somebody/anybody to fill the "emptiness void" regardless how little he knew that person. He would always express his emotions and how he felt about me.....but I only knew him for 2 months. I told him I honestly didn't know how I felt about him, but I liked him and that I enjoyed being around him. He used to claim I was "scared" of a relationship. The truth of the matter was I just wasn't as attracted to him as he was to me, and didn't feel comfortable discussing intimate things with him.

 

I have another friend that was the same way...married for 14 years, now going through a divorce, but wanted to get into an immediate relationship with someone again. (And he is now....just not with me). No wonder people go through multiple marriages/multiple divorces because they don't take the time to evaluate their relationship or potential mate. They just want to be in a relationship!

 

Oh, and just in case you're wondering, the guy I was seeing for 2 months, started ignoring my phone calls. I had to talk to his friend to find out what happened. Apparently I was dumpted for a bank teller with 3 kids! He could have handled it the mature way, returned a phone call, and said he was seeing someone else. I could have handled a friendship with him, but apparently he wanted to cut off all ties........

[Double J]

Good question, Suzy. I can honestly say that I fell victim to this situation in my last relationship. I became a little too emotional in persisting something "official" with my gf who insisted that she wasn't ready for something so serious. She wanted more of a fling type of thing, and that totally made me feel like she wasn't as into me as I was with her. Of course, if someone you like tells you they're not "ready" you know what that means. It is only a matter of time before a person can get tired of expressing how they feel without getting anything in return. It eventually feels like a waste of time - like you could do better. Plus, feelings wear out. If I start to sense that I'm not getting what I deserve, I'll probably get tired and move on in a matter of a few short weeks.

[SaSaRai]

heh , took me 6 years..... and she completely blew me off everytime i talked to her.... soooo.....