alisey Posted November 20, 2004 Share Posted November 20, 2004 I had unprotected sex with my boyfriend around October 20 and i was supposed to get my period on November 1 and i haven't gotten my period. My breast tend to hurt alot, I go to the restroom alot,and i have cramps every once in awhile i also gained weight but isn't it to early for me to gain weight or to fell these symptoms. Im really scared to take the pregnancy test but i know i have to is just that Im still hoping that Ima get my period. Do you think that is possible that i could feel all of these symptoms right away????? please help im very confused and i dont know whats going to be the next step Link to comment
avman Posted November 20, 2004 Share Posted November 20, 2004 No, its not too early to feel all these symptoms. Those are very common in the early stages of pregnancy. You need to take a pregnancy test. Putting it off won't change anything. And if you are, you need to be under a doctors care for your health and the health of the baby. Take the test. Link to comment
DBL Posted November 20, 2004 Share Posted November 20, 2004 Well you play you pay. You should start talking to your parents about this. I would not wait much longer before trying to find this out. If you are pregnant and you do not plan on keeping the baby your chances of doing so will diminish. You are almost a month late, thats not good. You should always have protected sex, I believe you can even get condoms at the free clinics or planned parenthood. DBL Link to comment
Cadence308 Posted November 21, 2004 Share Posted November 21, 2004 I agree with the others. Sorry DBL, a little late for the condom lecture! You need to get tested. First, take the home pregnancy test or to save yourself the extra $10 go to a clinic. It is pertinent to the health of you and your baby. Link to comment
DBL Posted November 21, 2004 Share Posted November 21, 2004 Yeah I know Bally. I thought about this on my way home tonight. At her age I didn't use condoms much either. I was almost in the same predicatament.(sp?) I guess I'm a hypacrit, but I did learn after my experience. DBL Link to comment
nexus532 Posted November 21, 2004 Share Posted November 21, 2004 take the test, or go to a doctor. This could be a mental thing due to excessive worring. But you now need to think about planes for a potential baby. Link to comment
SweetGemini Posted November 21, 2004 Share Posted November 21, 2004 hi there, your not about a month late like DBL said, but about 11 days late... this could be due to the fact that you are stressing too much and stress causes menstruation delay.. stomach cramps, weight gain are all symptoms of PMS (Pre-mestrual Symptoms), a lot of women get these symptoms before menstruation... women usually become pregnant during the ovulation period which is 14 days before you menstruate. It is when the ova is released from the ovaries to the uterus where it meets the sperm (if one is available) and becomes fertilized. When there is no sperm the cycle continues and you menstruate like you normally do.. Always have in mind, sperm survives in a woman for up to 7 days,... next time you have unprotected sex, or the condom breaks etc etc, make sure you go to the pharmacy and get the morning after pill... you can take this up to 3 days after unprotected intercourse... have in mind though that the quicker you take it, the more effective it is... you are sooo young, if you are to have intercourse, always use protection, there are so much contraception methods out there, im sure you will find a suitable one... you can try the pill, or the implanon insertion or even the mini pill... and always use a condom, because although the above methods prevent pregnancy they do not prevent STDs... Make sure you take pregnancy test 2 weeks after expected menstruation day... so in your case you can take it now... keep us updated.. Link to comment
SweetGemini Posted November 21, 2004 Share Posted November 21, 2004 oops, misread something.. yes DBL was right, didn't realise its the 21st already.. you are nearly a month late... take test straight away... Link to comment
alisey Posted November 21, 2004 Author Share Posted November 21, 2004 thanks u guys for all your advices. Today my mom left to Las Vegas and i have a chance to go buy the test, Ill inform you guys on how everthing goes wish me luck ! Thanks a lot Link to comment
tea Posted November 21, 2004 Share Posted November 21, 2004 it's kind of sad that the young people are the ones engaged in unprotected sex the most often. =/ it's a lot easier for teens to conceive. Sperm's more active, lasts longer, and girls have more active eggs that take in sperms more readily too. Link to comment
alisey Posted November 22, 2004 Author Share Posted November 22, 2004 well im really sad i took the test and it came out positive and the first thing that went through my mind was to abort but i talked about it with my best friend and b/f and they dont want me to abort. its sad just to think about it but u guys dont know how my dad is im confused and dont know how to tell my mom i feel very depress and i swear i regret everything i did guys please help me i dont know what to do!!!!!! Link to comment
avman Posted November 22, 2004 Share Posted November 22, 2004 Alrighty, first thing is to calm down. Freaking out won't help you or the baby. Next, get yourself some counseling so you can make a responsible decision. Don't do something on the spur of the moment that you'll regret forever. Take a little time to think about what you want to do. Open your phone book and look under the heading "Pregnancy". You'll find many advertisements for Pregnancy crisis centers. They will provide you some medical attention, information, counseling, and some guidance for what to do next. And generally this is all free of charge. They will be very nice to you, they don't judge people. You can also try your school counselor. They have no doubt run into this situation before and can offer you some help. These places will provide you with some support. You are going to need it. You have many options available to you so please consider them carefully. And remember, it will be alright. You've learned an important lesson. But its not the end of the world. You'll get through this and life will go on. Link to comment
DBL Posted November 23, 2004 Share Posted November 23, 2004 Wow...I guess some of us kind of already knew the results. Honestly you have to do what is best for you, not your bf, your friends, or your parents. You are the one that will be providing for the child, do not depend on your boyfriend doing that for you. The way relationships come and go these days, it is not a reliable bet. Do what is best for you, don't forget you will be tied to the father for atleast the first 18 years whether you two are together or not. Also keep in mind you may miss out on doing things that your friends will be doing. I know a few girls that had babies at your age, and they all regre not being able to do the things their friends do, because they have a family to think about now. Not that your dreams of what you want to do in the future will drift away, you will have to work much harder to achieve them. I agree with Avman...go talk to a counselor and they should help you figure out what direction you want to take. This will probably be one of the biggest decisions you will need to make. I would do this ASAP Good Luck and keep us updated on your decision. DBL Link to comment
tea Posted November 23, 2004 Share Posted November 23, 2004 If you want an abortion, get an abortion. The people who are asking you to keep the baby aren't the ones that are going to have to stay home and feed the baby when their friends are out partying. They're not the ones that might have to go to a less prestegious college because they can't keep up with all the work. The ONLY circumstance where you should keep the baby is if YOU want the baby. Friends and boyfriends aside, do YOU want the baby? Think for yourself for a second. Personally, I wouldn't even have told my friends or my boyfriend unless if I have made a decision on whether I'm going to keep the baby or not. Think for yourself. This is too important to let peer pressure get to you. Link to comment
avman Posted November 23, 2004 Share Posted November 23, 2004 With all due respect to tea, you are making a decision for more than just yourself. Your decision affects your child, as well as those around you. Its also a decision you have to live with for the rest of your life (regardless of what the decision is). Go get some counseling. And THEN make a decision. Link to comment
tea Posted November 23, 2004 Share Posted November 23, 2004 Well, Avman, I was also considering along the lines of a child being peer pressured into keeping won't be happy. How can the child be happy if down the lines she regret her decision? Is it possible that a child that was forced being kept will be mistreated after all the people who originally advocated in favor of keeping the child leave? Ultimately she needs to think about her welfare before she can think of that of her child. ...there's also that I don't think a fetus without a brain is a child yet and I'm not one for the slippery slope argument. I agree that she has to make the decision herself. What I'm trying to ask her not to do is to be pressured into doing something she's not 100% comfortable with. Link to comment
avman Posted November 23, 2004 Share Posted November 23, 2004 I agree that she has to make the decision herself. What I'm trying to ask her not to do is to be pressured into doing something she's not 100% comfortable with. I completely agree. Thats why I recommend the counseling prior to making ANY decision. I won't get into the whole abortion debate as we all have our own personal feelings on that. But I do concur that she should make the best decision she can so that there are not regrets about it later. Link to comment
DBL Posted November 23, 2004 Share Posted November 23, 2004 Yeah she should go to couseling and they will go over pros and cons of keeping or aborting the pregnancy. I just know from personal experience. One of my x's was pregnant at 17. I dated her when she was 21, although she did not regret her dauther she regretted not hanging out with her friends. Eventually what happened (after we broke up and even before we got together) she ended up pawning her daugher off on friends and family so she can go out and have a good time. So her daughter was rarely sleeping in the same house as her for the few years she had to "make up" the time she missed. DBL Link to comment
SweetGemini Posted November 25, 2004 Share Posted November 25, 2004 hmm adoption could be another option, that would be a miracle for some parents who want to adopt a healthy child... and yes, some girls may regret keeping the baby because they feel like they miss out... they feel like their teenage years have been stolen from them... but... on the other hand, you have those who regretted aborting their child, and end up living a life filled with guilt... or you have those who keep the child, and are so happy they made the decision to keep the child, because they end up understanding the meaning of life, and how much happiness a child can bring to you... this is a very difficult time for you.. if it happened to me, although i am NOT ready for a child, i would keep it, because it is mine, it is my child... there is no way i would let anyone take MY child away from me although i do believe that children should come after marriage... this is tough, hmm i agree it would be very good for you to speak to a counsellor, im sure you will do what is right for you... all the best and keep us updated... Link to comment
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