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i dont wanna be just another fancy, not again.


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hia everyone,


k wel im always the type of guy that girl just fancy, like a girl that i know she really likes me, shes with this guy but she said she doesnt really like him and he disappoints her, then why is she with him and not me. i just dont get how she can like me but not really want anything more then 'just to hang out'. girls in my area are like that, they have a boyfriend but they still fancy other guys. which is fair enough, but its not how i work, how i do things.


i confronted her about this and told her how i feel, i said something like..."when i like someone, as in you, i like only you, atleast till i know that something cant happen between us." but she was surprised, one minute she's tellin me that she really likes me and she spoke about me with my friends, she was asking loads of questions and stuff, they told me she seems really keen on me. but on the other hand she doesnt want anything to happen cos she also has a boyfriend, im thinking..."why the hell do you give me your number, act really nice, tell me you fancy me? and then your surprised when i tell you i want more." well dats not exactly what i said, i told her dat i wanna know where i stand, dat i dnt just wana be the guy you see sometimes, the guy on the side. and she was like "what do you want me to do?" ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, this is really annoying!!!! how can she expect me not to get attached and to grow feelings for her. it might have been better if she just told me she had a boyfirend when we first met, atleast then i would have known where i stand, atleats i wouldnt get attatched to her. and i wouldnt get my hopes up thats something might go right for a change.


i think i upset her a bit to. cos i cant wait around for ever but i really like her, a lot! what do i do? how can i move from just being another guy that she fancies to be somthing more? plus there is the fact that theres probably more guyz that she just fancies i cant compete with everyone, i wont!


i need some help, some advice, please, i rely dont know what to do. god this is what i hate about myself, i get attatched too quickly. i know im only 16 but i wanna be in a proper relationship.


thank you for reading and for any replies. sorry the message is a bit long.

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I really commend you on how you handled this situation. It's very hard to know that someone likes you but that they are also taken. The thing is, and this is my opinion, if they'd leave their current for you what's stopping them leaving you for someone else? She also sounds like she's been holding back and leading you on if she didn't tell you about her boyfriend up front. You've made your decision I believe (you don't want to be the 'on hand just incase boyf') and if you don't hold true to that I"m afraid you could just be setting yourself up for disappointment and heartache. You'll find someone deserving of you. Let us know how you're coping.



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firstly, thanks for replying Betty.


secondly, i get what you mean when you say it sounds like she was leading me on, but for some reason its how girls do thing around here, not leading people on but more like having a bf and meeting up with other guyz they like. but the thing is she was genuienly surprised when i told her how much i like her...i think she thought that she was just a fancy to me too and that i was like her, but im not, i only have feelings for her and but she has a bf and probably other guyz that are in the same situation as me.


i think i need to speak with her properly, cos after i said all of this she kinda just left, i knw dat was rude of her but i i think i probably just scared her off. she didnt really tell me what she thought of all of this.


like you said 'i dont wanna be the on hand incase bf'. which is true but i cant just get rid of my feelings.

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