completely worthless

[excelalways]

i cant seem to do anything for myself anymore. i can't make little simple decisions without freaking out or crying.

i don't understand what is wrong with me that i can do little simple tasks.

 

i have a great boyfriend of almost two years, and a caring, loving family.

 

my boyfriend always has to take care of me and try to help me when something is wrong.

 

i don't think anyone should have to put up with what i put them through.

 

i feel worthless and i feel like a burden. sometimes i think that it would just be better if my life was already over, but i know i can't do that to myself because that will hurt them even more. i'm not worth the time or the trouble and i just want to end it already. but i can't.

 

sometimes i find myself planning out how to die. like from a wreck, or something of the sort.

 

i don't understand what is wrong with me. everyone always says i need to talk to someone. for years, i have talked to people. they never help.

[Cadence308]

excelalways, you sound really depressed. How long have you been feeling irresolute and crying for no reason? Those are sure signs of someone who is severely depressed. Even though you have supportive people in your life and it seems like things should be okay, but they're not, it could mean that you have a biochemical imbalance. This has nothing to do with your situation, but the signals in your brain.

 

There are new drugs out there and they are improving all of the time. Have you thought about talking to a professional counselor about the way you have been feeling? They could help you talk about the way you are feeling and help you get on some medications.

 

I also have depression and have felt like you many times. I've also tried some drugs to minimize my bad feelings. My depression also seems to have a seasonal component to it. I get more blue in the wintertime. I'm not on any drugs right now because some of them were actually making me feel worse than without them. I still have my down days, though.

 

I hope you get some help so that you can feel good again.

[Lily04]

Wow, I was thinking something very similar today..except not that I'm a burden on anyone, just that I want to die except I couldn't because my mom would have a mental breakdown & possibly kill herself (she is already quite depressed) and I couldn't do that to her..

 

But I concluded was that even if it gets really bad, life is not nearly that bad yet..you are still young, beautiful, have a caring community of friends & family. You have a boyfriend who loves you & supports you. You are surrounded by love, in other words, by people who care for you. Love does not entail 'burdens' -- to care for one implies that you would give the world to help them through their problems, because helping is never hurting -- it is simply the outcome of love.

 

I think I have the opposite problem in that I think the world is too much of a burden for myself, not the other way around..I just don't want to deal with it anymore. If that is true for yourself as well, just think that you have people to help you get through tough times -- that's what friends are for -- and no matter what happens, you're still a valuable person. Everyone has their own unique qualities they can offer to the world. Sometimes I think that I'm not intelligent enough to go anywhere, that's one of the main reasons why I'd commit suicide..but that's really a narrow view. Even if I end up working at McDonalds for the rest of my life, I can still pursue other things that can satisfy myself intellectually..the 2 premises that life can, to some degree, be controlled by yourself & secondly that life entails choices keeps me going. Don't know if that helps, but I would build a thesis out of that if I could..that's really the only reason why I'm living at this point..

[thisisnotanexit]

you're not worthless..no one is. and do not consider yourself a burden. you're just being hard on yourself and i don't know why. you sound like a great person. and i know the people in your life would HATE it if they did not have you in their lives. you think you're a burden, but you're not. these people care about you, so how could you be a burden? life gets hard sometimes, its not your fault. please just remember you're not alone. anyone of us here would be glad to help you and talk to you.

 

check this out! --> link removed

 

if it makes you feel any better, you're not alone. most of us here, myself included, have been or am where you are now. the important thing to remember is that you CAN continue living and the rest of your life isn't going to be like this.

 

don't be so hard on yourself. try and have a little confidence. if you maintain this attitude that the world is against you and you'll never win, you're setting yourself up for failture. you can do anything you want and you're just as important as anyone else. don't forget that and don't let anyone convince you otherwise.

 

 

try talking to someone..your friend or someone you trust..or one of us. anything you have to do. or if you ever feel really down, watch a good movie or listen to some good music. get a hobby. learn to play an instrument. join a club or organization. study. write. take a walk or exercise. you're gonna have so many things happen for you if you just stay strong and believe that your life isn't always going to be like this. you can do it. you can get through this.

 

i know life gets hard, believe me i do. life is a struggle sometimes, but you'd never enjoy the good if you never felt the bad. stick around please and enjoy the good parts of life, because they exist i promise you. you're a strong, wonderful person and i hope you can see that. and again, if you ever ever need to talk to anyone, please msg me or anyone else on here. take care and visit this site

 

link removed

 

or call

 

1-800-SUICIDE

 

see ya

[excelalways]

thank you guys very much for your help. you really are a great help.

i don't always feel like that, but most of the time i'm just down about everything.

i'm always very overwhelemed with what needs to be done. i always need help with everything. and when i try to talk to people (especially my boyfriend) i know they are tired of hearing me say the same stuff over and over. THAT is when i feel like a burden. in fact, i'm sure i have made close to the same post on here over and over. you guys always help me out, but soon after, i find myself posting again.

 

i will probably continure to add to this post, because there is always so much on my mind.

 

thank all of you for helping me.

[Caesium]

excelalways im in the exact same position, except i dont have a bf cos im not gay! But in the same position about having caring friends and family, but just feel down all the time for no apprant reason!! and reading this post makes me feel better knowing im not the only one, and everyone's reply helped alot too! Thanks.

 

But a quick question, Will all these depressing feelings over nothing ever go away???

[CrystalDawn]

It can take time for feelings of depression to go away. I've been depressed off and on for over a year now. My bf's really helped though and so has alot of other people. But I do feel like I'm a problem all the time. The feelings may go away and they may not. It depends on the cause of the feelings.

[thisisnotanexit]

hey

before you really hurt yourself, please remember that you WILL NOT feel this way forever. i know things are hard right now, believe me, i've been there. but you will get through this. don't hate yourself for mistakes made in the past. that's the past, forget about it. just make sure you're around to live in the future. no one's perfect. believe, you're not alone. there are people out there that can help you. please talk to someone about how you're feeling. it's awesome that you're talking about it here, but you can talk to other people like your friends, family, a therapist, etc. there is help. don't give up, it's not worth it. hey,

hang in there, you're gonna be ok. life is hard sometimes, believe me i've had these same feelings. but believe me, suicide is NOT worth it. you're NOT going to feel like this forever. growing up is hard, but i promise very soon there will come a day when you feel much better. you're so young, don't give up now. it's really not worth it. for now try to do things that make YOU happy. watch good movies, listen to good music, hang out with friends, TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT HOW YOU'RE FEELING, write, read, exercise, take a walk (it's supposed to help depression). you know, try to occupy your time with things that make you happy. we're all here for you here. we all care about you. you're a special person in our eyes . please just hang in there, you are going to feel better. and again, don't be afrad to talk to more people about the way you are feeling. they are there to help you. remember, you are loved! please don't give up, you've got so much life left to live. and please don't cut yourself either. that can be so dangerous. there are healthier ways of dealing with it i promise. hey

i'm here for you, we all are. you're not alone, remember that. try your

best to stay strong and get through this, because i know you can. i've been

there. make sure you stay away from everything that can cut you. get rid

of it, throw it away. tell some people about this so that they can help you

too. stay away from anything that could trigger you. watch good movies,

write, read, listen to music, TALK TO SOMEONE, exercise, go for a walk, etc.

never be afraid to ask for help, because there are people out there that

can help. it's wonderful you want to talk to us, but there are other people

out there too i promise. you're going to be ok. if you do end up cutting,

remember, stay away from wrists and scary places like that.

 

remember to make sure if you are considering suicide, get rid of everything that can harm you. get rid of anything tempting. tell people to help you out with this too. talking always helps, there are people who want to help you through this. get rid of anything that triggers you. hang in there, there is a better way

 

if you ever want to contact me

you're not alone! PLEASE check out these sites, they really help

 

http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

http://www.nostigma.org

areason.org

http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/depressd.htm

http://www.samaritans.org/

http://www.mentalearth.com/menta...ct=SF&f=60

crystal.palace.net/~llama/selfinjury/

http://www.enotalone.com/forum/v....php?f=686

http://www.everystudent.com