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...are they waiting by the phone for you?

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This site has been a tremendous help in my healing process. I truly needed both the sobering, slap to the head realization that I had been transformed into a walking zombie thanks to an emotionally-retarded heart and the fact there seems to be literally hundreds of others on this site suffering the same rough roads.


I've learned (and am still learning) some very valuable lessons that have been difficult to swallow but, at the same time, have been the cold truth - truths I (like it or not) had to accept.


1.) The people in your life who truly care about you give you advice based on how you're acting and how you appear to feel.


In other words, listen to your friends. Your soul cries to them in a last ditch effort to save your own humility and bail your ass out of the on-going pain. Friends tolerate you making excuses for your bad relationship and offer their guidance in the most fragile approach possible to salvage whats left of your self-esteem...because they love you. LISTEN TO THEM.


2.) There are bad people in this world...a.k.a., SELFISH TAKERS. As long as you're giving...they are there to accept. Wake up and ask yourself what 'little something special' things have they done for you lately? Does it seem as though they're always too busy...or only treat you half-way decent after ignoring you or saying something mean? Not good.


3.) Never, ever...wait by the telephone. I once heard a song containing the lyrics, "Don't be reckless with a person's heart and don't tolerate those reckless with yours". Its true. Life is so very short. Far too short to be knelt down in front of an abuser, waiting for them to take another whack at you. Get up, brush yourself off, chalk it up to experience...and realize the pain your heart is feeling as you're walking away is simply your re-birth into the brave new world your friends have been trying to tell you about. Cry until the crust falls off...it will take a while because your ex did their best to ensure it was solid so you couldn't leave. Trust me...you CAN leave. Nothing worth doing is easy...and you're definitely worth it.


I deserve better. You deserve better. Finally, my anger is gone. The hurt is manageable and the healing continues.


I'm starting to love me, once again. The rain is almost over and the clouds are starting to part. I can see the smallest glimmer of sunlight...just up ahead.


Hang in there...weather the storm. I know you'll be strong and survive, as well.



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