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I just dont know what to think, Please help!

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I guess my problem is more emotional and psycological that anything but i really need another persons opinion.


When i was younger i was often made fun of and bullied because i was overweight and guys would always say they would never date me because i was ugly. Since then i've lost weight and i guess grown into my looks so to speak.


The thing is i still feel like that ugly, overweight person. Friends tell me im attractive but i dont know why im just not able to believe them and see it in myself.


To reinforce my insecurity when im out with friends, i often make eye contact wigh guys for a while, however they dont come and talk to me, this just makes me feel even worse.


I guess my question is how can i see myself as attractive, and how do i know im not just convinving myself of a lie?

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Hi I too was bullied in school, and it hurt me really bad, I dont think i ever came to terms with the phrase the ugly duckling becomes the swan, but believe me it is true, I had no friends , I changed schools numerous times, and decided it was time to get confident my sophomore year, so I bought some new clothes , my style (not anyone elses) changed schools and started over, I couldnt believe how my clothes and appearance made my life change, I became Homecoming queen my Junior and senior year, and I graduated, Became a Bud Girl in 1997, and am currently modeling for Roxy, Life turns around , dont worry about the bullies they wont be there in the end, school will be done before you know it, love yourself be confident and things will turn around for you!!! All those people that bully you will be the ones that are overweight in the end missing there teeth!!! I promise... [/b]

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Amber is right. You need something clothes, new hair cut, something to give yourself a lift. I'll relate a story that might help. Years ago when i was in the eighth grade (no Menusa, the school had floors LOL) there was this girl who I befriended, she was probably 4'10 or 5' at the time, not what you call cute at all, very pudgy, and yes she was overweight. No one would have anything to do with her.. except me .... By the ninth grade year she well became a young woman, and it was so funny to watch.. all the guys that would not give her the time of day, she still didn't and they couldn''t understand why... We are still friends to this day. I see her maybe once or twice a year in passing, and she always introduces me as the only 'friend' she had in school. Point being, She HAD HER DAY and SO WILL YOU. But it won't happen by accident, find something to make them notice you. Whether it is a chance in clothes, attititude, or whatever it is. BUt regardless, BE YOU! Don't try to be someone else. Masks don't work very well.

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When I was in school (yeah I'm a thirtysomething mom but just listen!) I had big thick glasses and was a tomboy... not a pretty picture. I wasn't overweight but I didn't really know how to make the best of what I had, and my hair was stick straight and short. I got picked on a lot and made fun of for my glasses all the time. But then my junior year in high school I finally got contacts and a lot of changes came after that in the way of makeup and stuff. I always had money because I'd always worked so I just bought a bunch of clothes and makeup and experimented with what I liked. You have to create your own style in order to feel good about yourself. Much later on, I now am told all the time how beautiful I am and people always guess me to be about 23 or 24 when in actuality I am 34. I really think those that have the toughest times in school will have their day.... I'm having mine! And you'll have yours!


Just remember, being more attractive isn't always what it's cracked up to be. You have to constantly wonder if people have an ulterior motive and stuff, you'll know what I mean when it happens to you. And it already has begun, just push it along a little bit if you don't want to wait any longer. It will happen, I promise!

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