Girlfriend is pushing me away?

[Lovehelpwanted]

I met this girl a few months ago, and we started dating after only a few weeks. She was very much in to me and in our first few weeks we were always intimate and I often stayed overnight. I really fell hard for her and she did too, as she was the first to tell me she loved me. I feel like everything was fine and dandy and we had so much in common.

 

Fast forward to the past week, and things have taken a 180 degree turn very quickly. And I'm at a loss for words of why. She left to go to her parents for the weekend(we're both attending same college) and she was texting me over the weekend how much she loved and missed me and wanted me to hold her when she gets back. Well she gets back Monday and of course I come over. Things we're not as nice as I thought they'd be. She really being quite a ***** to me and really for no reason. Now, I'm not an overpowering ******* and I usually just let her say what she wanted to say. Tuesday was a bit of the same thing and we again did not have sex, but only held hands and cuddled, but I felt like she didn't mean it. She was still being a bit of a smartass to me. Now Wednesday, she invited me to come with her shopping around. Of course I came, and I helped her get around town. For the most part, she was a bit more friendlier than she had been for the past few days but as the day went on, she started getting angry towards me because I was having trouble finding a bus stop. We get back to her place and she eventually insisted I go home at like 7 because she had "things to do". She was polite about it and I left.

 

Now the past day and a half, texting her has been a complete nightmare. She's been very vague, and I do not see any smiles, or "babe, hun" or anything of that sort. She has not said she loves me. Considering how often we would see each other and text, I felt like something is wrong and that she is maybe losing interest in me. I eventually asked her last night if she was okay with our relationship and she says "idk". I then ask "Do you still love me?" and she again says "idk and even then goes on to apologize...like apologize that she doesn't love me anymore. She says "I'm just not sure about things, I really don't know" Now, I nearly almost broke up with her at that instance but I insisted that I'll leave things at that and that I'd like to see her tomorrow(which is today) and she wasn't sure if she'd have time. Which is ridiculous considering I know she DOES have time. Proceed to today and she kept making up excuses to not see me and kept pushing back the time I can come over. She eventually says "What are you going to die if you don't see me everyday?" and this set me off. I didn't really think I was being over clingy, but I do think I had reason to be concerned about the health of our young relationship considering she pretty much admitted that she's having doubts. I decided to tell her that I will give her some space and let things cool down. At this point I plan on letting her be for a while and see if she reaches out to me again.

 

With all that said, I'm really sad and down about things. I'm really self conscious that it's something I said or did. I know she's had issues with her family and school but she would usually have me over to help her with those things. This past week has been very confusing and I feel like she's probably going to leave me without actually telling me. Maybe she's talking to another guy. I don't know. I just want to know what you guys think I should do, or if you think what I'm doing seems appropriate for what has happened? Maybe it's a lost cause at this point. I don't want to lose her already..

[ExcitedtoSleep]

You need to relax the grip that you want to have on this girl. Frankly, she may not be interested in you. Let her contact you. If she has any interest in you, she will initiate contact.

If five days go by without a response, you can leave her a text that shows you are still there, but if there is no response after that, then it is over between you two.

[Dawn717]

This has a few similarities of my last recent relationship, only it wasn't this harsh.

First off, what you are doing by giving her space is good to let her clear her mind, and think things through on what she wants. Don't pressure her and don't feel obligated to text her, because in the long run she will be the one texting you telling you her feelings if they are in the right or in the wrong, but if you don't hear anything then it's best to move on, Hun. I know those words aren't what you would want to hear, but if it's this serious, and it seems like you are having to walk on egg shells with this girl, then you deserve better who isn't going to give you mixed signals.

[Lovehelpwanted]

You need to relax the grip that you want to have on this girl. Frankly, she may not be interested in you. Let her contact you. If she has any interest in you, she will initiate contact.

If five days go by without a response, you can leave her a text that shows you are still there, but if there is no response after that, then it is over between you two.

 

That's what I plan on doing and I appreciate the honesty. There's really nothing more I can say to her at this point. If she wants to see me, she'll be the one to initiate contact like she did in the past. It's up to her if she wants to keep it going. It's just sad that it's come to this already. I feel lonely.

[Lovehelpwanted]

This has a few similarities of my last recent relationship, only it wasn't this harsh.

First off, what you are doing by giving her space is good to let her clear her mind, and think things through on what she wants. Don't pressure her and don't feel obligated to text her, because in the long run she will be the one texting you telling you her feelings if they are in the right or in the wrong, but if you don't hear anything then it's best to move on, Hun. I know those words aren't what you would want to hear, but if it's this serious, and it seems like you are having to walk on egg shells with this girl, then you deserve better who isn't going to give you mixed signals.

 

Yea, I know what you mean and thanks. I hope she will come around and ask me to come see her soon but with she has said the past few days and her vague attitude, I can't expect that it will happen. Who knows, maybe she will realize she needs me but if not then so be it Thanks for the warming response too btw.

[Lovehelpwanted]

She ended up breaking up with me today, with her main reasoning being over me taking her phone out of her hand when she didn't want to talk and thinking that I was trying to go through her texts and messages and stuff. That it reminded her of the way her father has treated her Mom. I've apologized and tried to convince her to undo her decision and give me another chance, saying things like it was a misunderstanding(I was trying to get her attention, not go through her phone) and that I promised to not do anything like it again. With all that I said, she's pretty much made her mind. I'm pretty depressed right now and I don't think she's coming back.