I am here for ALL of you! Learn from my mistakes, newcomers.

[TopFive]

I've been on this forum for 8 months and a lot of readers have seen me at my lowest point ever. I thought I'd never be okay. I went through the sleepless nights, breaking no contact, drinking heavy ect. Little by little it continues to get better. Being the type of person i am, I still think about my ex every day, but i know i'm much better off without someone like that. From time to time I come on here and read some of your stories and I instantly sympathize. I especially sympathize for the men on here who gave their all to someone who cheated or instantly replaced them. Those things hurt, but with time you learn to accept what happened and focus on you.

 

I'm here for you guys because I can relate and when I was down the people on here helped me get through the toughest time of my 22 year old life. If any of you ever need to talk, do not hesitate to PM me. And to all you newcomers, here's a little advice:

 

Don't EVER contact your ex! It will only hurt you even more.

Stay off of social networks for awhile. You will be tempted to see what your ex and their new lover are up to.

Spend quality time with friends and family.

Listen to good music.

Keep busy.

Read TopFive's first 5-10 post because they'll give you an idea of what NOT to do in your healing process.

 

Have a great day everyone. You will be fine.

[Steve55]

Hi TopFive,

 

Thanks so much for doing this.

 

How do you heal when you have it see the other person every day at work? We didn't have a serious relationship, but I fell hard in the short time we were together. We were friends and worked together for several years before we started dating. We're ended it very amicably and we are back to being friends. She's dating someone new, and it's been very hard for me to heal.

 

I tried the idea of keeping things to work-related stuff. That didn't work, because the personality that I fell for comes out even in our work contact. I tried concentrating on negative aspects of her personality, but none of those would be deal breakers for me if we had stayed together. I've also been doing several of your suggestions and they have been helping, but it is slow going. Any ideas?

 

Thanks.

[benjii]

This give me alot of hope there light at the end of the tunnel I think I'm at the lowest but slowly moving my way back up. I was dumped and cut off completely from the day she left and the last 2 months all the worst things what you can think off have happened. I'm also 22 and was with my fiance for 6 years but I can see now she treated me very badly trough are relationship but I still love her no matter what

[TopFive]

You just have to give it time. I remember i was messing with this girl on the basketball team i school and she turned out to be one of the loosest girls on campus if you know what i mean. She kicked me to the curve and slept with a few of my teammates. It sucked because i kind of liked her and i had to see her every day because it was a very small campus.

 

You just have to give it time and go out there and find someone better suited for you. When you move on and find someone else special, you'll see her at work and be indifferent. You wont forget the wild sex you had with her, but you wont care.

[TopFive]

This give me alot of hope there light at the end of the tunnel I think I'm at the lowest but slowly moving my way back up. I was dumped and cut off completely from the day she left and the last 2 months all the worst things what you can think off have happened. I'm also 22 and was with my fiance for 6 years but I can see now she treated me very badly trough are relationship but I still love her no matter what

 

Awwww man I've had so many friends in your exact situation. Girl our age are messed up arent they? You just gotta take care of you and get your life together(start your life). I can just about bet that you don't have all your ish together in life right now and it's all because you put her first. Well she's gone now..Off somewhere being the dumb female dog that she proved to be. Get with friends and live life. You're gonna always think about her and always love her, but what can you do? She's gone. I know it hurts, but you guys couldn't work and that really isn't a bad thing. Go have some fun because I am! It took me about 4 months, but i'm me again and I'm enjoyin life. ENJOY LIFE!

[ErikSifu]

TopFive :

 

I remember your situation 100% bro .... from social media (twitter) to family members talking to you !!! I was ( i guess still am ) in that situation .... its been almost 7 months for me , still think about her and it hurts everyday but you know what, im starting to come back to my old self and im ok with that .. It will just take some time.

 

Im glad you are doing much better !!! thanks for coming back and updating us on your situation ...

[throwaway13]

Thanks for being there for the rest of us. Take care!

[Kazuya]

Pal. At least you are just 22. A hell lot of things you can still do at such young age. Imma 28 already and how I wished to be 22 to correct most of my mistakes. And yea I think I am one of the men who fell into your category about being sympathized, thanks for the care but somehow I don't need much of that anymore! Of course I would think of my ex regularly but now I feel much better, perhaps partly after knowing what happened to my ex via social networks. Sucks and hurts like hell initially, but thank god (I'm a Atheist btw) that I do not need to deal with nonsense for now and wouldn't be in the future as well.

 

Just keep doing whatever you have to do and you be on the right track. Have a great day!