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After the first date


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So I had a great first date with a guy I had known from school but hadn't seen in years. We went to the comedy club and I really enjoyed his company, we spoke the whole time and everything was fine. At the end of the date when parting ways (always the awkward part) we hugged and sort of pecked but it was pretty awkward (I think because i was so attracted and nervous towards him), to which he commented on and then said lets embrace to make up for it lol! I texted when I was home and he text saying 'thats good hope you are nice and warm now, night xx' However i don't know if I will hear from him again or if i should contact him? before our date he would sometimes wait days to reply just because he is so busy and laid back, but i would like to see him again. Should I wait it out and let him communicate if he feels like it?

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It sounds from your description that you texted him after the first date. OK, nothing wrong with that (although I would NOT have done this unless he specifically said "Please text me when you get home so I know you got home safely") I guess but I say you should NOT text him again. You say you're already feeling "attracted and nervous", and he's "busy and laid back" so if you do all the pursuing, you will never really know how he feels about you.


I think you have to give him a chance to process his feelings and let him get in touch with you on his timetable. I think it's helpful for you to relax, busy yourself doing other things, let things with this guy unfold at an organic pace and be receptive to his communication. Mirror what he does, if he texts you, text him back but let him initiate the next date. If he waits days to contact, wait a day to contact him back. In my opinion, being overeager and doing all of the pursuing (as a female) when dating is not a recipe for success.

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