6 hours til he says its his time..*Please..I need advice*

[EclipseXkim621]

Okay..earlier today, my guy friend Sam text msgs me and tells me that after work he needs to talk to me cause he felt like just crying and talking about some stuff....Now this guy is a great friends and very loyal, but he lives in this "ghetto thug" world of his own..He has a decent life from what i see physically...as in like..if you looked at him..youd think hed have money, etc...materialistic things mean nothing though...and well...From what i know ... his family is "normal"; but his mother passed away and he doesnt get along with his step mom...(He texted me about a minute ago saying : It's my time to go see my Mom Kim...time is up for me...I'm making the call)

 

I know there is this girl he cares about keeps breaking him down and hes trying to better himself with a g.e.d. and such. Well, about 20 minutes ago he texts me and told me he couldnt take things anymore and that hes ready to just take his life..Now being the guy he is ... and how he always keeps his word; and is a very loyal person...really scares me on how true this might be. I'm a 19 year old girl and never really had this pressure on me before..I never realized how scary it would be to hear this..

 

I know he might just be telling me for "attention", but as interested in psychology as I am..i realize that IT IS A CRY FOR HELP, and more then likely it is, but i refuse to double chance that..hes at work til 2am and I wont let myself go to sleep until hes off so we can talk and stuff but..I'm so scared...Anyone that has been thru this with a friend and saved them, please help...I'm only like 6hours away and I'm scared..really scared.. I want to make sure i do the right thing for my friend. its honestly a life or death situation Thanks you guys...I'll appreciate anything

[johnagent1911]

Best thing to do is to just hear him out... Also don't try and 'fix' his problem. Just be there for him.

[lostlove]

okay, first of all, you cannot, i repeat, you CANNOT just hear him out at the moment. you need to get him some help. as much as you may want to help him personally, you can't...he needs professional help. Even if he does not go through with this, suicidal thoughts are extremely dangerous. At the moment I would suggest talking to him, and trying to find out what exactly is wrong. If you find out that it is definite that he is going to try to commit suicide, then you must call 911, asap. I am not joking. This is a life or death situation. If you think it'll make him mad at you, then tough. Is that really worth his life? I don't think so. Talk to him, but don't try to help him. That's very important. I've had many friends who have had problems in this area, and I found that if I tried to help them, personaly, it DID NOT WORK. So, the second you read this, GO CALL HIM. Ask him what's wrong, try to comfort him. If it doesn't work, and he is still talking about suicide, then CALL 911. Before calling 911, make sure you have his adress ready. Good luck! I really hope he ends up being okay!

[asdf]

Call the police, tell them about this kid. Also, comfort the kid as long as you need to, to stall him.

[EclipseXkim621]

Thanks alot...I will do just that...thank you so much, its always great to have outside advice .. let me tell ya

[thisisnotanexit]

i agree with what everyone else is saying, you need to get help and hear him out!

 

check these websites out:

this is about handling a call from a suicidal person

link removed

 

and this is just a more general site on handling suicide

link removed

 

make sure he knows you're there for him and you care about what he's going through. let him know that he can get through this and you will help him do it, and that he's not alone. try to convince him of the future and help him remember how temporary all this is. but really, if he seems determined, you have to get help! 911 or 1-800-SUICIDE, whatever you have to do! you can do this, you sound like a great person who wants to help..if you need any more advice, please feel free to contact me or anyone else on here. i hope everything goes well, just please try not to get discouraged and do what you have to do to help this man..do whatevedr you have to do to save this life..just support him

 

take care

[Francis]

A friend of mine wanted to commit suicide a few years ago and I called the community health center in her neighborhood. They even went to her place to take her to see a psychologist (I was at work). She started seen a counsellor and now she is fine. It would be a good idea to get some professional help, they know how to handle these situations.

 

Good luck!

[EclipseXkim621]

Thanks so much...I ended up helping him more then ever...I never had a friend that seemed more serious about something like that!....it scared the ..u know what..out of me....You guys seriously are great..thank you so much for all the advice..it really really gave me that "umph" I needed to help the situation.

[dumb]

im sorry its horrible he wants to commit suicide but if he truly has his heart set on it you wont be able to talk him out of it. im not saying not to try, maybe he just had a melodramatic moment and wanted to know someone wanted him alive.

sorry to be so disgustingly negative

[unexpectedvictim57]

i definatly agree with dumb. even if you think you changed his mind, he'll still want to do it. i don't think he will be able to sto wanting that, nless he gets professional help , but i know i would ahte my friends forever if they told someone about me cutting, so its watever you think sis best.

[Vacuum]

I agree with dumb as well,

 

if someone wants to end it all they will, whether thats a good or bad decision is for everyone to decide on their own.

 

I've been in the same situation as you eclipsex271, the whole time threat thing. It is very scary, i hope you don't have to go through it often.

 

My ex-girlfriend would do it ALL THE TIME. She never did go through with one of her threats.

 

She did however one day end her life with out any threat or warning.

 

I also somewhat agree with the call the police or parents thing.

It could be a bad thing.

I was told if I called the police or her mom and told them she'd kill herself forsure

[dumb]

i had a friend who got pissed off because i sorta went off on her about all these things that she'd done that i thought were stupid, wrong, etc. she totally flipped out which would have made me mad, because what i did was not nearly as brutal as what she had done to a friend of hers earlier, but i felt horrible because she said she might commit suicide, now we're okay, but it still freaks me out that she did it in the first place

[finnerss]

Eclipse, it's really great that you're helping your friend and that you've also realized that you're not alone either in the matter of helping someone out.

 

It's really important that he gets professional help pronto, as much as I would like to differ with dumb and everyone who has agreed with him, I couldn't, because they have a really good (However disturbing) point. One of the most common things in suicidal people actually going through with it, is going through some very uncanny cycle :

 

first being really depressed and might or might not be seeking attention, that's a dangerous phase, but seldom does it makes them go through with it.

 

second, is when you are really determined, most people seem even "Jolly" all day long and no one even thinks there might be something going on, that's the most dangerous moment with someone who is having more than suicidal thoughts, that's when people go through with it and I guess it's needless to say the major hazzard is that they don't seem to need help anymore.

 

So you can make sure that thing's are getting better by having people help him, professionally, and especially with his family. Understanding suicidal phases is very important, since the way we try to help people going through such a down might not be the best. Suicidal thoughts obbeys no logic most of the times.

 

Hope this helps and also reach out for more people around him so they can become instructed in the best ways of helping him out.

 

Best wishes and great to meet someone like you who cares and acts with intelligence.

 

Sergio