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my new boyfriend is ... weird

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Where to begin? OK, I met a guy online and we started talking and we hit it off really well. We decided to meet up.


We met up Tuesday just gone, and I believe that we had a good time and that we were really right for each other. He was just so amazing and I really like him. We decided that we should be girlfriend and boyfriend.


Anyway, two days on from the meeting, he doesn't talk as much. He doesn't text me as much as he used to before we met, and well, it's just crap.


So, I'm just wondering, what on earth is he thinking? I mean, I really like him, and when we met, he was the one who was making all the moves and stuff like kissing me and hugging me. Surely if you don't like someone, you don't do these sort of things?


We also spent 10-11 hours together. If he was really annoyed or bored of me, he would have gone home earlier than he did.


Anyway, we got on really well, and he just isn't talking to me as much as he did now. I don't know why. I don't know if it is because my phone is just being annoying and not receiving messages (which it has done before) or he is ignoring me.


What do you think? I need some help!




I sent a message to him via email and told him all of this, well not all, but explained how I was feeling.

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Hey Dgirllamius,


If you're spending 11-12 hours together at a time, then I don't see why you would need to spend an extra hour on the phone or have him text you regularly. He probably sees it this way also.


I don't think you should worry at all. If I was spending that much time with my boyfriend, I wouldn't feel the need to spend more time talking to him on the phone.


You spent more time speaking on the phone/ texting in the beginning because you were still in the 'getting to know' phase. Now that you have both gotten to know each other, it doesn't seem necessary to him to call you as much and check in all the time.

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Oceaneyes, you are absolutely right, as usual. After you spend that amount of time with somoene, you kinda know alot about that person, and the need to be on the phone, and e-mailing and texting becomes less. You are more secure in your relationship with that person, and can then also start focussing on the other important things in your life. Good luck!

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Thanks guys! I can sort of see where you're coming from.


To be honest, I don't really want a high phone bill texting him all the time. I know it's going to be a high one this month. I guess the odd text in the morning to say how you are, what you're doing etc is enough.


We don't spend a lot of time together as it is. We can only see each other once a week because he lives 60 miles away. I would like to speak to him all the time, but I guess sometimes it's un-necessary. Some things that are said in texts can be saved for when we speak online later on or something.


We do speak online like every day or so, so I guess all can be said then. No use wasting money on something when it can be saved for later


Thanks again guys!

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A few questions for you: he's not online but you met him online???


As far as this all goes, connection or not, you just met him right? 10 hours at a time is a bit extreme for any relationship. You might find that he thought you a bit...I don't know, easy? Kissing and hugging and all that aside, don't underestimate the chemical attractions that men often feel. Don't make it the end of the world if he doesn't call or respond to an email. Just write it off as a good time and a lesson learned. Make first dates simple and short, have several of them before you start forming intense attachments to someone. Get comfortable in your own skin, then get yourself involved. Relationships are a crap shoot. You win some and you lose some. The house has the advantage and it seems to me that you might need to spend some time doing the things that make you really happy. Don't worry about him. The sooner you realize the only person who can fulfill you is yourself, the better.


That's all I've got. Best of luck.


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