what does it mean?

[maybeNot]

Ok, Ive been with this guy for over a year now. Things are really great for us both. Everybody says we are so both in love. But when I open a topic relating to getting married he always find something to divert the topic. Then finally got the guts to ask him directly, "what if i want to get married soon" then bang, he said he loves me but we should STILL wait so we can establish our relationship. I never really have doubt that he loves me until now.

Does he really loves me and just need time. Or what??? Pls help!

[JynX]

I dont have a doubt that he loves you...it sounds like he does. To some guys marriage is a very big step. It may be one he's not ready for. By avoiding the subject, thats the message he's sending out. I dont see the hurry...you've only been together for a year. The best time to get married is when you're BOTH ready for it...otherwise it wont work out.

 

JyNx

[lillady898]

Consider this. I am very, very in love with my boyfriend. No matter how much I wish we could live together, have kids, and all the perks that come along with marriage, I wouldn't marry him for a few years after the point I fell in love with him. It's not because I question the relationship; I just want to get more confirmation that things would be perfect for the rest of our lives. It's difficult to explain. But, it's one of those things just worth waiting for.

[OceanEyes]

Marriage should never be entered into until both people are 100% comfortable with each other. Just because one person isn't ready doesn't mean that there isn't real love existing in the relationship, it just means that it isn't the right time for something as serious and life-altering as marriage.

 

I think it's good when someone comes out and says they're not ready, rather than just saying, "ok", even thought they're having doubts.

[AlleyCat]

Just give him more time. It took my b/f 5 years to feel that he was ready for marriage, then when I said no (*I* wasn't ready), he realized that he wasn't really ready either. It's been a year and a half since then and now it's my turn to wait for him to be ready.

 

It definitely doesn't mean that he doesn't love you. Marriage is pretty serious and you shouldn't get married until you're both 100% ready.

[Leslii]

Why are you pushing marriage already?? It is 2004. With the divorce rate

as high as it is, how can you blame him. Also he is a guy and they do NOT

like the idea of marriage until they are absolutey positive. That doesn't mean he doesn't love you it just means he is not ready.

If you push it you will lose him. You may be coming accross as needy and

insecure and that is very unattractive. I know alot of women who dated thier men for 5 to 10 years before they were married. Be patient !!!!