am i worried about this too much?

[Nothingelsematters]

k im kinda sorta with this girl, shes 16, im 18, i know its illegal but we have been trying to do it for awhile now, at least 3 times, each time ive had trouble getting it up, ive never had this problem before, but i havent had sex for over 5 months. Im in highschool, living with my parents and my mom and dad lately have been really interested in taking every chance they can get to tell me how i should not be sexually involved with anyone, i think they want me to know that before i leave for college. I know i probly shouldnt but we both want it now. They even made a list of rules and one of them was no going past second base, i already have, but im not gunna tell them!

now ive been thinking a lot about what they have said to me and i think that may be one of the reasons ive been having this problem, the last time we tried i was almost fully hard when the phone rang (we were at my house) and it was my mom, one of the first thing she asked was if i had broken "the rule" the night before (prom, and yes i did break the rule) and if i was being good now (i had my finger in her) that really freaked me out and when we went back to try and finish it after i was done talking i could not do it.

well this is really bothering me cause ive never had this problem before and this girl wants me as much as i want her, maybe even more, i dont want to keep her disappointed. any words of advice welcome, thanks ~

[Di]

Have you thought about marriage, babies, a home, financially-food, medicine for when the kids are sick, college etc.

 

I'm sorry, you maybe 18, but shouldn't you be more worried about the future instead sex?

 

Listen to your parents, their right, they have been there.

[Nothingelsematters]

yes i have thought about those things, college ill be starting next year, if there is a baby, not too likely, but if there is one, ill take it and love it because i made it. College could wait until things settled down, money there is enough to live by, she wouldnt be able to leave her home anyway. right now im more worried about this poison oak on my arm than if i had a baby.

[SwingFox]

Nothingelsematters,

 

I understand what you are going through. I have mixed feelings about your posting.

 

My suggestion is, though, to be very careful. Have you thought of getting prosecuted for constitutional rape? I have heard of so many young girls that follow that path after their b/f broke up with them. From that point of view your parents are right.

 

I have to admit, though, and this is where I disagree with 'Di' that you are mature enough to make love. You reached the right age for it legally, as long as you take consequences for any action. At least use protection at all times. I am wondering if it should be wise to talk to your parents about YOUR points of view, but 1) that takes a lot of courage and 2) I am not sure if you will be able to do it and wether they would understand your feelings. I do know, though, that open and honest communication with your parents is very important.

 

I hope that this helps you on your way and wish you good luck in any decision you make.

 

~ SwingFox ~

[Nothingelsematters]

thank you swingfox, i think that you are right in many ways, as for being prosecuted for what i have done and might do i think that may be part of why im not able to now. This girl is not the kind to get angry after a breakup, she just gets sad, and i wouldnt do that to her so i dont know.

Talking to my parents probly would help but i dont think its an option in this circumstance, my dad might understand but my mom would most definatly not. Maybe ill move to a state where 16 is the legal age of consent. anyway i have to go to work so thanks again later! ~