Jump to content

Nobody Knows -As always, comments/criticism appreciated-

Recommended Posts

She's a broken record

That repeats herself

Over and over

Day after day

Though nobody knows

She claims to be fine

She laughs


Grits her teeth

And bares it

Though nobody knows

Cuts trace a map

Of veins on her wrist

They are the roads to recovery

Paths of darker days

Though nobody knows

Bathing in silver moonlight

With shadows on the wall

She sits alone



Trying to breathe

Though nobody knows

White tiled bathrooms

Stained in crimson glow

Are paintings of her pain

Though nobody knows

On the windowsill she sits

With eyes open wide

Legs dancing and crossing

Swaying and swinging

Hands rest on the lap

And over she goes

A smile on her face

Though nobody knows

When daylight doth break

And the door creaks open

They'll suddenly know


She repeated her words

Faked a wide smile

Traveled the map on her wrists

Sat alone in the night

And painted paintings

Of her pain.

Link to comment

wow that was an amazing poem, very well written and visual, i know i havent posted in here for a while. but i deffinitley miss the creativity of peoples minds, your talented and i like it.


you have a lot of depth in your writing and i think your trying to put a message accross the ignorance of others and what they dont see whilst showing the pain of someone who is ignored,


talent anyway, thanks for sharing it!



Link to comment

I liked it alot. I think the title should be "Paintings of her Pain" or something of the sort. I love the idea of painting her pain... its really interesting.


Very original, nice to see variety in talking upon the subject.


Fun to read. Read it twice out of interest, very unlike most other poems I read.



Link to comment

To My dearest Nikki,

that was one of the best poems that u have written. i kno that i tell u that a lot but its tru. i wish that i could write the way that u do. its amazing how well u kno the feelings of certain people and what they do when they are alone. thank you so mush for all your poetry. you always kno how to make me feel better... even though this isnt a "happy" poem it still makes me feel better to kno that others feel the same way that i do. well thats all for this poem... on to the others that i havent red yet...


Love always,


Link to comment
  • Create New...