Poca Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 that it's really gonna be OK one day. That the hurt is going to stop and that life will be normal again at some point. ps. and if you can give me a spesific day and time, it'll even be better. Link to comment
SteveNaive Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 Ok...first things first: Things do get better eventually! The Pain really does go away as life goes on... As to the specific date... I can't give you one. I am still waiting for my recovery... It will take some time, and it will be a slow process gradually improving... But it will be better then. For sure. I hope. Good luck! Link to comment
Poca Posted September 12, 2004 Author Share Posted September 12, 2004 thanks and you're right -- and I do believe that things will get better. Some days I feel so good and I can almost believe I'm over it, but then some days -- like this weekend, I just can't take it anymore. If I only not have to see him every day (at work), it would have been so much easier. oh well. Link to comment
herewegoagain Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 Poca - I see what you are saying, but I wish I did see my ex gf everyday at work. that way, you can show him/her that you are doing ok without them, etc. Also, I think that may even help you two to reconcile, if that's what you ever wanted. Just my opinion, but I'm sure others will disagree. Link to comment
Mjane Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 Sat. Oct. 2. 11:04 am. Link to comment
Mjane Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 Poca, I haven't even gotten to the point of having good days and bad days. I have good moments on bad days... but it's only been 10 days... although I hadn't seen him for 10 days before it happened so... the big looming date for me is Tuesday... the day three weeks ago when I blew it. But seriously while I have spent most of today fantasizing about a reconcilation... and then have times when I know it's over and I'm devastated... and then I'll go by a place where we had a fabulous time.. and I just am in shock that it's over... and then... But I know from past experience... that it does get better... kind of crappy that I have experience getting dumped but I digress... who wouldn't want this fabulous, witty, smart, decent looking, athletic babe???? I'm in as much pain as you. But I'll tell you about a moment I had today. I arranged a mountain biking ride this morning... a guy showed up who I have never met... my age range... ok looking although no real attraction on my part, but I know I'm like an oven and I warm up to guys... I had that feeling I normally have when I meet eligible men when I have a boyfriend... kind of removed... anyway.... I woke up half through the ride that I am ELIGIBLE!!!! I don't think I had enough time left to recover and flirt. But I was kind, sweet and klutzy. I crashed when I avoided a tree. Isn't that the way into a man's heart? An injured darling they can fix? Ok, off track there... Anyway, when I got to my car I realized... hey, I will meet someone else. I just met an eligible guy.... 10 days after the earth cracked open. It will just take time. My X is not the last great man on earth... and considering his issues.... Link to comment
Poca Posted September 12, 2004 Author Share Posted September 12, 2004 Poca - I see what you are saying, but I wish I did see my ex gf everyday at work. that way, you can show him/her that you are doing ok without them, etc. Also, I think that may even help you two to reconcile, if that's what you ever wanted. Just my opinion, but I'm sure others will disagree. It is good - in a way -- we still are friends, still share a common interest (poker) and we talk about every night and some nights (msn) when we plan. We also 'date' (withouth the sex) every now and again. The hard part is seeing him leave for lunch with other 'girl' friends. And flirting with other girls. That's what get me. Link to comment
Poca Posted September 12, 2004 Author Share Posted September 12, 2004 Mjane - thx for your post. It means so much to me and I experience every feeling you described above. My point is that -- I'm kinda average looking - not traffic-stopping, but also don't hire me to scare kids on Halloween, and I have a very outgoing personality. Ex - on the ohter hand -- is no oill painting ( and I really don't mean this in a MEAN way), and all my life I always had men interested in me. Maybe my problem is more the rejection I can't handle - I've also gained a couple of pounds - I'm not grossly overweight, but I'm no Calista Flockhart - and since I've always had a good athletic body, this extra 20 pounds doesn't help my self-esteem. I'm also a single mother and can't get out much to meet other people. BUT - I plan on going to this regular poker thingy on Tuesdays from now on, I'm trying to arrange a baby sitter, and though I'm not looking for a relationship, I would LOVE to have male friends now to boost my ego a little. Maybe the problem is just me. I dunno. Link to comment
Poca Posted September 12, 2004 Author Share Posted September 12, 2004 Sat. Oct. 2. 11:04 am. LOL -- OK, thanks. Duely noted in my calendar. I'll report back. Link to comment
Mjane Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 Ok, I guess confession time. I was about 20-30 pounds overweight for almost my entire life... I don't want to say fat people are lazy because I'm sure there are medical conditions. And I ran 3 to 5 times a week and I still was hefting around an extra 20 pounds. Guys hide it with pot bellies, but for ladies the blubber is all to obvious. And I hated it when if my running dropped off, I would gain a few pounds. I did the South Beach Diet. Started last year, have so far lost 25 or so pounds. Am a size six. I could do with losing another 10 pounds but frankly it's hard finding clothes this small. Can you imagine searching for 4s? Anyway I have given up nothing. I have just stopped eating sugar (face it -- it has no nutritional value) and those bad carbs, white potatoes, bread, pasta etc. Now it's not that I don't eat any of that stuff. I've been binging on sugar since the BREAK UP, but have also exercised almost daily to burn it off. If you change your diet (eat lots of meat, veggies, whole grains, just plain old healthy food) you'll lose the poundage. Good luck. As harsh as this sounds... guys don't want fat chicks... i'm sure some people will get on here and protest... looks don't matter, blah, blah, blah... not true. it's just a harsh reality that none of us want to own up to. Link to comment
kmconb Posted September 14, 2004 Share Posted September 14, 2004 everything will be alright. I'm 20 years old and I've been there done that 3 times now. Try not to talk to the ex for sometime; prove to them your an independent person and your life can go on. "Time heals all wounds" Link to comment
juz4storm Posted September 15, 2004 Share Posted September 15, 2004 Work is work. Stay busy and if you see him then smile and just say hello. Don't go out of your way to talk to him. Outside of work. Go out. Have fun. And don't look for anyone. They'll show up when you're not looking. Patience is hard and YOU CAN DO IT! Link to comment
Poca Posted December 1, 2004 Author Share Posted December 1, 2004 Sat. Oct. 2. 11:04 am. Funny thing is -- you were about right. THat's about when I was ready to move on. A couple of weeks later we got back together. And now we're basically breaking up again. Link to comment
PrincessLinzay Posted December 1, 2004 Share Posted December 1, 2004 You will get through this!!! Things do get better, although it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel right now. Be strong. There's no time limit for pain, but when it's gone, you truly feel like a better person. Link to comment
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