superfluousme Posted November 18, 2011 Share Posted November 18, 2011 So here is my previous thread of her reaching out to me. I think her and "just a friend" hit a rough patch, I got the I miss you, sending me pic of the anniversary ring I got her, etc etc. It's been almost 2 weeks, which seems to be the frequency she contacts me, and I got another text today. (I'm in Vegas right now btw) Her: Can I pick up my dads laptop after work? He wants it cuz it's the only thing he has left from the fire (1 hour goes by) Me: I'm in Vegas right now with a friend. Maybe next week. Her: Kay well let me know. He wants it. Have Fun. I found it rather odd seeing how her dad gave me the laptop to fix since the screen wouldn't turn on, and told me if I can't fix it to just toss it. So I'm left wondering if this is just her overt way of checking up on me. Either way my response displayed some higher value and I left it at that. If she does come over and sees me I think she will be impressed at all the changes I made. Lost 30lbs, completely redecorated the place so it's really really nice now, got a puppy (she always wanted one), quit smoking. I parlayed a potential meeting until after her Birthday on Tuesday. But maybe I'm reading too into it based off the texts she sent 2 weeks ago. I dunno, thoughts? Link to comment
sonypirates Posted November 18, 2011 Share Posted November 18, 2011 You're over analyzing and it basically does nothing for you but causes you stress. You should be listening to her though and having fun in Vegas. Get off the internet imo Link to comment
toby17 Posted November 18, 2011 Share Posted November 18, 2011 I think she misses you and wants to see you but it's still a long way from that to wanting to get back together. Don't expect too much when she comes over and don't initiate conversation about the relationship. Let the changes speak for themselves - 30 lbs is impressive! Then wait for her to initiate contact with you afterwards. In the meantime stop thinking about her and get on with your life, you want to be as cool and calm as you can when you see her, not anxious and expecting. Good luck! Link to comment
superfluousme Posted November 18, 2011 Author Share Posted November 18, 2011 In the meantime stop thinking about her and get on with your life, you want to be as cool and calm as you can when you see her, not anxious and expecting. Good luck! Funny thing is I have been moving on, seems everytime I start feeling good or doing well is when she pings me man. But I am at the point where I don't need her... I realized I never needed her. I want her, but need and want are two different things. It is a difficult road to navigate though considering she is still with the rebound. Link to comment
octour Posted November 18, 2011 Share Posted November 18, 2011 Funny thing is I have been moving on, seems everytime I start feeling good or doing well is when she pings me man. But I am at the point where I don't need her... I realized I never needed her. I want her, but need and want are two different things. It is a difficult road to navigate though considering she is still with the rebound. Funny how they always know just when to drop us a line. Link to comment
Angler Posted November 18, 2011 Share Posted November 18, 2011 I realized I never needed her. I want her, but need and want are two different things. It's a mean trick we play on ourselves, letting need and want become all mashed up into one entity. Truth is, no one needs anyone, but want can be so strong it feels like need. It is a difficult road to navigate though considering she is still with the rebound. I hear ya. Link to comment
superfluousme Posted November 19, 2011 Author Share Posted November 19, 2011 guess it's my hopeful side that thinks it's a veiled attempt at seeing how I am doing with all the miss you's and crap a couple weeks ago. I've been complete NIC. Which has helped. I guess we will see how it goes. I don't think she is really "happy" in the new relationship, mainly because I know she is not happy with herself. Uggh. Gotta play it cool. I know that birthday card is going to hit her hard. Very much a not needy card, but it mentioned some things DN said in my previous post that she should know. Since the meetup is after I guess I'll see what her game is and then resume NIC afterwards. She's been a jumper most her life and I was the only stability there so far, so cross my fingers that those rose tinted glasses come off sometime soon. But until then... movin along. Link to comment
superfluousme Posted November 21, 2011 Author Share Posted November 21, 2011 Ping... got another text last night. "Hey are you back from Vegas yet? I am at my old store and it would be really cool if you can drop off the computer" I just ignored it. Though it's kind of odd. 2 weeks ago she was all emotional texting me she missed me, and things that reminded me of her. Think she hit a bump in rebound land. And now 2 weeks later her texts seem to be completely devoid of all emotion. One thing though... rather than hanging with her boyfriend she's chillin @ her work. hah. makes me wonder. Oh well her birthday is tomorrow. She should get the card and I'll just drag her along a little more before seeing her (was not a needy card at all. After writing it I feel so much releif though. Made me really grasp acceptance.) After all what does she expect? Me to drive over there, or let her come over when SHE wants... NO!! This is on my timetable! Link to comment
Edmund Exley Posted November 21, 2011 Share Posted November 21, 2011 She is either using you to get attention when things are rough with her new guy, or she is a relationship bouncer and it viewing you as the next vine to reach for as she dismounts from the current relationship. Neither is a good thing for you to be. And your last statement...thats exactly what she expects. Link to comment
superfluousme Posted November 21, 2011 Author Share Posted November 21, 2011 And your last statement...thats exactly what she expects. That's the way I saw it. I'm no longer "mr nice guy" nor a pushover. She will get it when I make myself available, I'm not in the habit of cutting her a break or devalue my time because she wants something. Besides men are supposed to be leaders right and we make the decisions Link to comment
Edmund Exley Posted November 22, 2011 Share Posted November 22, 2011 Actually, I think it works best when partners make decisions together. BTW - If she always wanted a puppy, why did you wait until after it was over to get one? Seems like you have made a lot of "Look at me, Im better off" moves to spite her. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.