High school friends - I've lost them?

[replytome]

Hi,

 

I'm currently in postgraduate school studying finance. I worked in asset management for one year at a major bank with a good salary, and overall I have very good prospects.

 

The reason for this is because I have been very serious about my career, and in the process, my high school friends have stopped liking me. The thing is, they still hang with the same bunch, go to the same places and do exactly the same stuff we used to do in high school. I got tired of those things, and wanted to meet new people, do new things, and frankly getting drunk as hell every night at the same old pub with the same old people really got boring. Also, these people have never worked a proper job. All they think about is studying easy stuff, and partying. They openly say that they will study as long as possible so that they will keep getting money from their parents, and because they don't want to work. They seem scared of the real world. They also have given their careers no thought. I mean I know exactly what I want to do, and I have been tailoring my studies, extra curriculars and work experience to allow me to get my dream career.

 

One guy that really annoys me is my ex best friend from high school. See, I was quite popular in my group of high school friends. He was just the guy that was with me, so anyone who wanted to hang with me, had to deal with him too. They didn't dislike him, but they wanted me, and he was just in the package. When I started to stop hanging out with those guys, this best friend of mine took the opportunity and probably talked * * * * behind my back to them, because I know he's manipulative in that way, and so now he's really good friends with them, and ''popular''.(even though these are high school terms and we're 23 for god's sake.)

 

They all seem to be stuck in this high school mentality, they don't care to meet new people or do new things. And this best friend also has no idea what he will do. He's done a masters, and is now doing his second masters :S and will do another two postgraduate courses...so he will start working at the age of 27... and will have spent more than 100K of his dads money on education.

 

I hate using my parents money, and feel guilty for doing so, because I know there are many people out there that deserve this education more than me but don't have the funds. Therefore I take it seriously, and I work as hard as I can to honor that.

 

Anyway, this ex best friend told me several months ago, while I was working at the asset management firm, (with colleagues at least 4-5 years older, very fun bunch) exactly this: ''nobody likes you anymore''. First of all, I left them. I didn't find them or their activities interesting anymore. Secondly, nobody likes me? and who the hell is everybody? I have a ton of friends, because I moved away from the high school crowd to meet new people. But he doesn't see that it's not that I don't have friends left, I just changed my friends, and have a lot more now and much better friends now. But that's how they seem to be, they're stuck in their own spoiled little world, and then they're bitter because one of the group wants to experience new things and not just drink drink and drink at the same old places.

 

I know it's all a bit jumbled up here, but my main point is this: Why do I feel like crap because ''I've lost my high school friends, and they don't like me anymore''? Because I know that I'm the better man here, and technically, even though they think they're cool, i'm the cool one. But it's as though I won't be satisfied unless THEY know it, and unless THEY think to themselves ''OH! Look how well he's doing (me), he's doing great away from our group''... I want them to see that i'm better than that, that i've progressed from the same old high school crap, while they haven't.

 

Btw, after my years work, i also travelled the world with money I earned and saved. I had my own apartment I rented while working (only one of high school friends who ever had their own place and paid for it themselves) etc... basically I grew up while they seem to not have grown up.

 

And yes, at the moment against all of my logic, I feel like the loser, and the reject. I don't know why.

[replytome]

I should add that I think there has always been a jealousy issue with this ex best friend. We always did the same activities, and I was always the better one. By far. The last thing we did was football, for years, and I am much better but because of bias with all the high school friends, they all act like he's the good one. I know because unbiased people always say I'm better, and because I just know it, I mean I can see it myself. For example, he makes a shot, everybody says wow!, i make a shot with my left foot (i'm a righty) and it is equally as nice, but with left foot which is much harder, and just silence, they don't recognise that it's good. Last time we played which was about 2 months ago when I came back from travelling, I scored a sick goal, and all the unbiased people were shouting that it was amazing. He didn't say a word, he was on my team, but didn't even do the ''good shot'' or anything. So there must be something there...right?

 

and before anyone says anything, Yes, I do realise I sound like a child in this thread, but it seems to be the one thing that gets to me.