can any one help me please

[fluffyf]

hi need some advice my best friend of 1 year is now my flatmate and about a month ago we ended up sleeping together we decided we both loved each other and started dating everything was so good bearing in mind i'm 25 he is 18 when the love of his life from school found out about us and got in touch he was a mess saying he loved me but loved her and if he stayed with me he would always thinking what if as there has always been a reason why they chouldn't be together eg her boyfriend so i said to him ok i love u and if it's meant to be then i have to let u go if u come back i know we r meant to be so now i have to live with him and her staying all the time round the house i have nowhere to go as my friends live 100 miles away and my mother was murdered 6 years ago which i have dealt with how the hell do i get over the love of my life when he's everywhere i go i can't hate people but i'm starting to hate his girlfriend please someone must know how do i get over this?

[paul475]

...but that doesn't mean it will be easy.

 

You ask your ex in the nicest, most sincere tone of voice that you can, to find another place to live.

 

You won't be able to heal your hurt, much less control any outcome, that involves dealing with the distraction of having other people in your face all the time.

 

If he wants to be a bigamist of some note, and you're into that, you can ask for a more formal arrangement involving his current girlfriend. But my sense is that this whole thing is overwhelming and you need to get some time and space between you and this emotionally abusive relationship.

 

Best wishes....

[fluffyf]

thank you paul u made me realise that in a way it is abuse, last night things got worst i had a friend who is male stay over so my flatemate got upset saying he chouldn't stand the thought of me being with someone err hello u can't have ur cake and eat it i metioned him moving out and he got really upset but i know it's for the best put a ad in the paper today so he has no chocie paul u have been a great help thank you so much sometimes it just needs a outsiders view and u saw what i chouldn't thank u again please feel good about ur self u have really made a different's in my life now i would really like it if u could email me