Infidelity - once only

[portugal1607306432]

I did it last night. I am away from my partner for 2 months - in another country for work. I have had a strong connection with a work colleague, and we have been taking drives together on weekends, and having long indepth conversations. He has even written a song about me in the 4 weeks that I have been here already. I love my partner dearly - but something about this world and my life here "now" is completely removed from my normal life with my partner. I slept with this other man, my work colleague last night. And I know that it will not happen again, I feel terrible. And I will also probably have difficulty talking to him like we were before. I will go home, and I do not intend to say anything to my partner. This is a once-off, and I am already feeling bad enough. Is this the wrong thing to do?

[wandering_mind]

yes. i think it's better to get out the truth now. no matter, what lies almost ALWAYS come back to haunt you and the truth eventually comes out. why not talk to your partner and get out with it. i think it would be better to do this. that way the two of you could talk about what problems were going on in your relationship that led to your infidelity in the first place. show him that you can be trusted in this relationship by confessing to him now. if he finds out years or even months for now, you may never be able to get him to trust you again. if you feel guilty about this, it's not going to look like you do if he finds out later...or accidentally. also, if you don't tell him, are you really sure that your not going to be tempted to do something like this again? i know you feel bad about it now; however, you did this to your partner and to yourself for a reason. that reason might not be apparent right now. that's why you need to talk about it--so that you have some hope of saving your relationship. i think relationship counseling is a 'must' in this situation. SHOW him that you are sorry and that you love him. SHOW him that he can trust you. put yourself in his shoes, now is not the time to be selfish.

[sisterlynch]

Since you are only in that country for a short visit, then what you have done probably will not have any lasting effect for you in your other relationship. Since this is the end of Oct. You probably got together with you original boyfriend again and I bet that you told him. If you two are still together at this point then you probably have worked out your differences by now. Remember that you are an adult and you are capable of making adult decisions. The guy in the other country meant nothing to you. He looked good at the time, but it was an affair that you can live with. How has it redefined how you feel now in your current relationship?

[NEBO]

I, take you ______, for my husband,

to have and to hold,

from this day forward, for better,

for worse, for richer, for poorer,

in sickness and in health, until death do us part

 

guess those vows meant an awful lot to you...

 

like all women, you won't be satisified til you've crushed his self-esteem completely. despite your flatulent vows, that's one thing that can be counted on.

[knightbear]

you go girl and tell him what your up too

[Enrique]

You should tell your mate about your infidelity. I cheated on my GF and hid it from her for 10 months approximately, right now we are separated, and she is trying to find out if she wants to be with me or not. Cheating is awfully wrong, but lying about it only makes things worst. If you love him, and this will never happen again, you should tell him; if the cheating will happen again, you should tell him too! I Cant stop thinking that if I have accepted my mistake from day one, everything could have been better. She would only need to forgive the cheating, not the lying.