What have we all learned from our breakups?

[TheDoctor]

What priceless lesson did you learn from your breakup? I learned that problems dont go away on their own or by being the best person you can be. And to never forget that you and only YOU truly have your own back. Me, myself, and I thats all I got in the end. I think the lessons I learned from this breakup have made me a better person than I ever could have been with her. What are the priceless lessons you have learned?

[lady00]

deleted.

[hurtbylove]

Lady has it down pretty well. It's funny how we all find out these things on our own and the commonalities we all share.

 

I guess some things have to be experienced to be believed. When you are in love, no one can tell you otherwise, nothing matters but that other person.

 

It's cynical but I don't think I will give myself fully to anyone anymore. It just risks too much when so much can go wrong. Don't base your own happiness and well-being on someone else, be aware of your own needs.

[fantasia2004]

Took the last words out of my mouth I agree .

 

 

i made the mistake of giving all of myself instead of partial instead of the other way around.

 

 

Never again

[spaceandtime]

Here, here. I gave my heart to someone and the pain of the whole thing is horrific.

 

Never again. It's all about my own needs now.

[densil]

Yeah, I agree with all of your comments about having other interests etc, but...

 

I've been to hell and back going through this last breakup, however, I know that one day, I will, again, (maybe unfortunately) fully give my heart to someone again. I know full well that by doing so I will leave myself vulnerable to further heartbreak. I believe that there has to be as few "boundaries" as possible to get the most out of love.

 

I would have thought that I would have learnt by now, I dunno, I'm either a hopeless romantic or a fool or maybe both!

 

Steve

[TheDoctor]

Theres nothing wrong with giving someone 110% of your love and effort. But just remember this and youll be fine; Love someone with all your heart but never love them more or even as close as you love yourself. Just because I love a girl with all my heart doesnt mean it has to be even close as to how much I love me. And most importantly, trust yourself. We so often let too much trust into relationship and it bites us in the rear end

[Pebek]

I gave my heart to a girl and instead of keeping it she gave it back. Now I'm going thru hell.

I dunno if I'll ever give myself fully to another woman.

[lady00]

there's a difference between giving 110% of your love an energy to someone and having them be your everything. it is crucial to maintain friendships and other interests outside the relationship. I once read this great article which argued that ppl often lose themselves in relationships and forget about their outside interests and in so doing they lose the things that attracted their partners in the first place.

[deebee]

What have I learnt?

 

That it wasn't ALL my fault!
That it's over once one partner withdraws their love
That I should communicate my feelings and opinions more readily
That I shouldn't place too much emphasis on the relationship and my partner for my own happiness
To listen to my gut instincts more
To pull back a bit if I am falling madly in love. It feels good but can blind you to rational thought!
That being totally open and allowing your partner to share your fears and negative emotions can backfire on you later...
That I can cope with the fallout and recover

[Miranona]

i have learned that:

1. Your life has a center...and it shouldnt be a guy.

2. JUST BECAUSE HE CANT LOVE YOU ON YOUR LEVEL, DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO SINK INTO HIS.

3. Never try to save a drowning man, you'll only drown yourself with him or worse, he'll use you to save himself and won't help you.

4. "While good things never last, some don't even start"

5. DONT EVER COVER UP ANYTHING THAT IS REAL UNLESS IT IS A ZIT.

6. DONT EVER TRY TO FIGHT DEMONS IN SOMEONE ELSE'S HEAD.

7. DON'T EVER TAKE ADVANTAGE OF SOMEONE WHO HAS STRONG FEELINGS FOR YOU AND DON'T EVER LET SOMEONE TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOUR STRONG FEELINGS....the person who has strong feelings that have been taken for granted has a tendency to come out a stronger person because he/she knows better than to play with someone elses feelings....they know the pain.

8. there is more to life than someone you do not have/someone you lost...there are people out there who worry about living till tomorrow...live your life. Choose life.

9. DONT EVER SETTLE FOR SOMETHING LESS THAN WHAT YOU WANT.

10. NEVER BLAME YOURSELF SOLELY, IT IS HIS FAULT TOO.

11. If he has someone else, let her have him. You can not depend on someone for your hapiness.

12. Despite what anybody says, YOU come first.

 

"WHAT YOU DON'T HAVE, YOU DON'T NEED IT NOW."- songline from U2