on the verge to reconcile!

[shelby]

I broke off with my ex 6 months ago and we started talking again,we were in a unique situation it was a long distance relationship. I am willing at this point to move down to be with her. I recently got back from visiting with her we spent two weeks together and it felt awesome.But she still is keeping her guard up, she felt hurt from our break up, and she doesn't want to get hurt again. She wants to give it time before she jumps into the relationship again. When I got back we still kept in frequent contact, She did mention how much she enjoyed spending time with me and that she missed my presense and how we have a great connection and she missed that. She did say that she still cares about me but is a reluctant to say more, she doesn't want to feel pressured she said alot has happened during those 6 months we were apart she feels more independent and some days likes to be by herself,How should I react with that? How much time should I give her? sometimes I feel that I'm being strung along and she's keeping her options open, I hope i'm wrong. I expressed my feelings towards her and right now I feel I shouldn't say anymore and let time take it's course. In our conversations she does mention future plans together and that she would enjoy going on vacation with me. I feel that if she really cares about me why is it so hard for her to pour out her emotions? What approach should I take and should I stop pouring out my feelings and be a little more reserved and have her come to me? Any suggestions

[pktmkm700]

Right now she is in the drivers seat, you broke it off with her. It understandable for her to keep her guard up. I kind of in the same situation that you girlfriend. My girlfriend of 2 years broke it off with me becuase she needed a break to find herself (whatever!). We were in a long distance relationship becuase I graduted from college and she is still there. We didn't talk for a while and then she started coming around again like you are doing. Hell I was hurt for a while but then I really did start to enjoy be single, so much freedom nothing holding me down. I am down right happy right now. I have a feeling she wants to get back together but given her history its going to take quite a bit for me to completely let her back into my life. She already dumped me once and why would i want to set myself up for being hurt again, its not fun.

 

You got to wait this out man, and the more positives she see's from you the closer she is going to get. It just takes time.

[Beec]

Yes, you should not just go and pour out more feelings to her.

 

You should wait and see if she comes to you. If seh doesn't come to you, if she makes no move to come after you, then you go back to her and try to make her feel a little special, then back off again. Switch it on and off.

 

At the same time, think about what she is scared of and what she was hurt by and try to alleviate her fears. Why is it not going to happen again? Why is it less likely? Why should she just take the chance? You might not want to tell her flat out, keep some mystery about it.

[shelby]

thanks for the input it's much appreciated! She just left today on a 3 day getaway with a couple of friends a married couple, In a way i feel this may determine our fate. I don't know what to expect when she gets back, I feel at times that she may meet someone there, but I guess I shouldn't think about that! But all I want is her to be honest with me.