We were so dumb!!!

[neewollah]

I talked again to my ex-GF 10 minutes ago...

 

She is dead set on not wanting me as a BF anymore and just wants me as her best friend, whatever...

 

Over the past days I've only got to a few conclusions...

 

a) Small things that aren't worked out grow and blow like a nuke!

b) C-O-M-U-N-I-C-A-T-I-O-N

 

In the last days she has told me some things that were real eye openers!!! Some of the problems we had were so dumb!!!

 

But we never talked about them! We just argued, got heated up, fought and that was all we did.

 

Others were real problems that were afecting even my health, I'm taking care of them, but the most "important" ones were so dumb.

 

 

 

 

About the "best friend". We all know what that means, Hell will have to be frozen, the Messiah will have to come back and the Messiah would have to make a miracle for me to have another chance with her again...

 

 

I don't know how do I feel about her right now. I'm not even sure if I ever loved her, if it is just atachment or just the fear of being alone what makes me "feel" I want her back.

As friends we are great friends, we were kind of best friends before our relationship, and everytime we broke up we had a GREAT time as friends.

 

How much more must I wait?

How much more must I fight?

To be able to find the light that I know is in me?

I've lived in solitude, sorrounded by multitudes.

I've never been able to love, cause I don't even love myself

 

That resumes pretty much how I feel like.

 

Maybe I'll give the "frienship" a try. I know it is too early and I may want her back, but I must be strong about it.[/i]

[JT]

Who left who?

 

Leave her and don't talk to her. You'll get over her faster that way. Go find another peson and make it seem like your not waiting around for her. If she comes back she comes back.. if not you'll be well on your way to getting over it. Don't fall for the best friends trap.. thats keeping you at arms length and you won't be able to get over it if she's constantly there. Forgive, forget, move on.

[DopeStar]

Move on, seriously, it's the only way to get past this. She doesn't want to be with you but she wants to be friends? that's crazy, she's messing with your head so she has someone to fall back to when her other intentions fail. My ex said to me after 5 years and cheating "lets have an open relationship we are so young". I kicked her to the curb where dirty b****** belong, I feel better. I couldn't have handled that, so I'm out there, moving on, talking to everyone, try it, it's really liberating and you will soon see how dumb that girl is acting. You've probly also forgot how much fun it is to be single and free, I did, now I couldn't be having more fun.

[TrueHeart]

I completely understand. I am attempting to be 'best friends' with my XBF, and I gotta tell you, its sooo hard. Hes already talkin about other girls he's met, and though I appreciate his honesty and forthcoming with the info, it makes me just sick to my stomach and still I keep a smile on my face. They'll never really do it to just be malicious, but thats what friends talk about, right? It sucks, and I am seriously considering just really ending it all because I can't move on from it. There will always be a lingering "what if" that will drive you MAD!

 

Even though I care for him, and you for her, remaining friends is more of an effort than it was trying to make the relationship work, You want to be there for them, keep the friendship, but the thought of them replacing you will absolutely just kill you... especially if you have feelings still. I normally don't like to tell people to move on, but I think you do.. just like I have to. It will also only complicate things for you when you decide to start dating another.... Save yourself the hardship..

[JT]

That happened with my XGF the first time she wanted to "not see eachother so much" and just be friends. I could'nt take it.. I told her repeatedly to leave me the hell alone, only to haver her call me back crying, then feel guilty.. this cycle really prevented me from moving on. We got backtogether for about a few months then I split from her. I could never get over the fact she left me the first time. So, that affected our friendship.. we cannot be friends for both our sakes.. its too painful. I cannot or do not even want to run into her.. it would be too painful as well.